My husband John 32m and I 30f got married 2 years ago. I’m John’s second wife, his first wife Isabel died 9 years ago in a car accident driving to an appointment. At the time, she was 7 months pregnant with a baby girl who they planned to name Rose. Rose also passed in the accident. John wasn’t in the accident, but he blamed himself for their deaths since he was working and couldn’t get time off to drive Isabel. Obviously this was very traumatic and he had to go to therapy for a long time to recover. He still talks about Isabel sometimes and has pictures of her in the house.
5 months ago, I found out I was pregnant. It wasn’t planned but John and I were still extremely happy. A few days ago, I went to the ultrasound appointment and it was revealed we’re having a girl. For the past few days, we’ve been throwing baby name suggestions around. However he came to me this morning and said he finally knew what our daughter’s name would be—Isabel as a first name and Rose as a middle name. I was taken aback for obvious reasons and asked him why. He looked at me weird and said that it was to honor his late wife and daughter.
This was surprising to me since we’ve talked about having kids before and he’s never mentioned wanting to name our kids after Isabel or Rose. I told him I wasn’t comfortable naming our child Isabel Rose since it would feel like we were trying to replace them. He kept trying to convince me and said that it would be like his late family could live again through our daughter, but I just want our daughter to be her own person and to not feel like she’s growing up in the shadow of 2 deceased people.
John got mad and accused me of trying to force him to act like Isabel and Rose never existed. I said that wasn’t true and that we would still talk about them and remember them with our daughter, but he said the best way to remember them would be to name our daughter after them. He also called me a hypocrite because I suggested my sister’s name(my sister is alive) as a middle name. I said that was different because our child would still have her own unique first name and I only suggested it because my sister is planning on being a loving aunt. Finally he called me disrespectful of the dead and that he wasn’t going to change his mind. He went to our room and hasn’t come out.
I consulted my family and friends and while most of them agree I’m not TA, a couple of them are saying John is grieving and I should just let him name this kid and I can name the n... keep reading on reddit ➡
DISCLAIMER: I have no experience in metalworking.
I would like to build a windchime with somewhat larger tubes than you get with the ones you can buy in most shops. So I am thinking of buying some alumimium tubes and cut them to size. Then drill two holes at the top and suspend them with a wire. But I also would like to paint them. I have seen powdercoating used on metal and that looks more durable but I have no idea about the cost and whether it is really better. Can anyone tell me how much it would cost to powdercoat some 10 tubes in different colours and if powdercoating is the way to go or painting is better. I am worried that painting will take away the resonance of the tubes.
UPDATE: so I found this really good website, which explains lots f things I did not take into account. http://leehite.org/Chimes.htm
What I understand: copper is best for sound, and the patina can be nice (like the statue of liberty green) so maybe better than painting. Now: is it feasible to engrave copper tubes. I know it is possible for copper sheets but maybe tubes would be difficult. In my original plan, I wanted to paint it and then engrave a text on it but I will leave out the painting step.
As you guys know. I lost my dad last year during the regular season(before the bengals played the lions) and he was my best friend and the whole reason I’m a bengals fan today. My father had always been obsessed with wind chimes and nature and that jazz, so during and after his funeral a few people would got us wind chimes in his honor. And anytime they would move and swing around we joke it’s “dad talking to us. So for Christmas I got my mom a wind chime with a Cardinal on it(cardinals are believed to be a visitor from heaven) I hung it up a few weeks back and I asked him to make them chime if they were gonna beat the Raiders and Titans and they did. so last night while sitting in the hot tub I asked if the bengals were going to the super bowl and the Windchimes starting going nuts!
I normally go out every Saturday morning and ask again and record it, and before I could even get over to the windchimes to ask it got windy and the chimes started going crazy. So I waited a second for the chimes to relax and asked my question and the wind picked right back up and the started chiming
One final time… For pops and #InTheChimesWeTrust
Edit- I’ll post the video tomorrow, unless you want it today
I (29f) have 8 year old daughter who has bad social anxiety as I had as a child. Recently we were invited to a dinner and we went since my daughter wanted to see her uncle that day. Well we got there everything was fine for a while until my sister (32f) said she had an announcement to make. Now me and her never got along, she was always jealous because I put more time into my studies got good grades and was my mothers favorite why she slacked off and got into trouble.
She announced she was pregnant, I was chill with it. I didn't mind, but here's the issue. 2 years ago I was pregnant with my 2nd child, but I had a miscarriage at 23 weeks. My sister knew this, never commented on it until now. After everyone was done congratulating her and it died down, she came up to me and whispered in my ear.
"Hope you aren't sore about your child dying and mine taking first place now since your little runt doesn't get attention from mom."
That shattered my heart, I stood up and grabbed my daughter and said straight to her face instead of whispering it.
"You and your child are dead to me and neither of you are my family, enjoy your attention from mom if that's the only reason you're having a kid then abort it now before it gets raised by a horrible mother."
I walked out after that. I explained what she said in a text message hours later. My mother is on my side and told my sister she would not be finically supporting her or her child and that kid is not her grandchild. But, some are calling me an AH because my sister is now in a hotel because she got kicked out and says if she has a miscarriage it'll be my fault. So AITA?
EDIT: I probably should have said this before and many mention how I shouldn't have said it in front of my daughter. My daughter is deaf, I'm still learning sign language so we normally talk via text or notebook. But, I see where you said I shouldn't have said it in front of her.
Basically the title. My fiance (42 and I (36) are getting married before the end of this year (2022) He has a son (17) from his former marriage with his late wife who passed away from cancer. I'd like to think that my stepson and I have a good relationship. however he is the most sensitive and emotional kid I've ever met. I'm not saying that's a bad thing.....but it does make it difficult for me to deal with him sometimes.
He said he has already prepared a PowerPoint project in honor of his mom and is planning on playing or displaying it at the wedding. This was an instant no from me for many reasons. My fiance said we should let him because he just wants to remember and honor his mom. I told him that this occassion, the wedding has nothing to do with my stepson's mom so I'm not sure why put a whole Powerpoint project there at the wedding about her. it takes away guests attention and makes them confused. My fiance said we have to respect his son's wishes and also said he'll pay for the screen and everything. We had a huge fight about it and I refused to even consider it. the whole thing is just a no go. I even offered to have maybe few pictures or a seat as alternative but my stepson isn't having it.
Things have been pretty tense now. My stepson isn't talking to me, my fiance just keeps trying to guilt me into saying yes and it's all just making me feel overwhelmed.
AITA for refusing to make this happen? my fiance commented saying my refusal is an indication that I have an issue with my stepson's mom and that am being unfair to him since he spent so much time and effort to prepare this project that obviously...means a lot to him.
Side Note - This isn't about my stepson's mom. I don't have any negative feelings towards her. In fact I think that she was a fighter (battled cancer not once but twice) she played huge role in what my fiance has become now and I'm so grateful for that.
Edit: I'm sorry I wanted to put a link for something but failed. I was trying to show the size of the screen my fiance showed me earlier.
About my stepson's grief: When I first met him, he seemed to keep to himself and not attend any family functions. even when inside the house. He avoids spending time with family, is quiet most of the time and doesn't really talk much. I suggested therapy but my fiance said he mentioned this once to him and his son yelled at him telling him to stop acting like there was something wrong with him by bringing up therapy. My fiance stopped... keep reading on reddit ➡
My(55m) wife (57f) passed away last year after battling cancer for a number of years. Prior to her passing her parents passed away in 2017/2020 (in their late 80s), all of their possessions and money was left in a trust that was to be divided between my wife and her 2 siblings. They were all pretty much in agreement as to who got what and what was sold which was great as we really needed the money to pay for my wife's care and couldn't afford a fight.
Recently my brother in law reached out to me and basically said that now that the "appropriately respectful" amount of time had passed since my wife's death I needed to return what was left of her share of the inheritance to my brother and sister in law since my wife and I had no children together. I responded politely that my wife had left everything to me and that I intended to give most of what was left to charities my wife supported prior to her passing as well as donate to the hospital that cared for her before her death.
He got very upset and said that it was family money and that I wasn't entitled to it and shouldn't be throwing it away and ended up hanging up on me. Now my sister in law has also resched out saying that as she as 3 children and a big mortgage she needs the money more than "some charity". So now I feel like I might be being an asshole by giving away what is left of my wife's inheritance instead of giving it to her siblings.
Edited to add, my wife did "will" me what was left for what it's worth and her siblings are clearly stated in her will as receiving specific things (a couple of items of her mother's jewellery, her car, and other family family heirlooms) so it would be hard to argue the will as they were left some valuble items.
I have 4 children, with my youngest Luli having past away 3 years ago at 2 years old. One of my close friends since high school 'Jane' was Lulis godmother, although she wasn't heavily involved in our lives as she was a chronic traveller.
Last month, Jane had her first child. They kept the gender a secret but Jane and I talked everything babies together as I'm her closest friend who has children, including names. When we talked baby names, Jane said she wasn't going to do middle names for her kids as she found them pretentious. During this time, Jane asked if I would be her kids godmother, and I said yes. When her baby was born, her partner sent me a text letting me know they were both healthy and the baby was a girl.
The next day, Jane posted a 'baby reveal' on facebook and revealed the name of her baby, whose middle name was Luli. I was obviously in shock as Jane had never mentioned giving her daughter a middle name, let along the same name as my kid. Then on instagram, she posted the typical baby reveal photo holding her baby's hand with the caption 'Luli' with a white heart. This was honestly too much for me so I turned off my phone. Nearly two weeks later, Jane reached out to my husband and asked if I was alright as she wasn't able to get in touch with me and asked me to come by and meet her daughter. I almost didn't but decided that maybe there was some explanation and agreed to come over. When Jane asked if I wanted to come over, she asked if I wanted to come over 'to meet Luli'.
We made small talk and when she put down her daughter for a nap, I brought it up and asked why her daughter's middle name is Luli. Jane told me she loved the name Luli since I'd used it, and since she was Luli's godmother, she used it as her daughters middle name to honor my daughter. I asked why she didn't tell me she was planning on honoring my daughter, and that I was blindsided finding out via social media. She told me she had just given birth and was recovering from the experience (which I 100% understand), but when I asked if she had decided to honor my daughter before or after she'd given birth, she asked me to leave.
A few days later she called and talked to me about her daughter's upcoming christening and our role as godparents. I cut her off and told her that I was sorry but I wasn't able to be her kids godmother. She didn't take this well and claimed that she was allowed to honor my daughter as she was her godmother, I can't 'hog her grief', and that I can't p... keep reading on reddit ➡
I (26M) have recently start dating again after a year since the unexpected passing of my late gf. I have since removed most of her stuff in my house except for a couple picture of us in the living room and I still regularly hangout with her family.
Initially, dating seems to go well with good conversation. However, I cant help but notice that whenever someone comes to my house and asks about the pictures or about my past and I bring it up, its ends not long after. While I know that not all dates are going to workout, but it makes me wonder. Would you consider that to be a dealbreaker for you? Any advice how to handle the topic?
I (25f) am pregnant with my first child. Both my and my bf’s families are very excited. Bf(25m) is the oldest grandchild on both his mother and his fathers side and this baby is the oldest grandchild/great-grandchild so you can imagine how excited they all are.
Initially I had no real issues but shit hit the proverbial fan when bf and I decided to not to find out baby’s gender. There was crying, arguing, pleading, all so that they could know what was between this poor child’s legs. In the end we put our foot down and said any more harassment over this and we won’t even tell you when bean is born! For context, my g-ma was just as bad as bf g-mas over this.
Last night MIL, FIL and my parents came over for dinner. Baby names came up in conversation and bf and I politely said that we have some ideas but don’t want to share yet. MIL cut in and stated “if it’s a boy at least we know the first/middle name will be ___”. A record screeched in my head. I was like “whaaaa?” My face clearly showed it because she went into a long rant of how all the first born boys have that name to honour her father that passed away (I’ve heard he was a great man but he died about 20 years before bf was even born, I never met him and neither did bf) and he was named after his father and that we needed to carry on the tradition.
My bf explained again that we won’t be discussing potential names for baby and steered the convo away from the field of landmines the convo turned into. Later on MIL followed me to the kitchen and again mentioned that if the baby is a boy we need to give him that name. I lost my shit a little and raised my voice (potentially the asshole for this) and said “bf and I choose what this baby is called, not you or anyone else. Back the fuck off!!” She left in tears and FIL told me off before following.
My mom said soft YTA because I didn’t have to cuss at her or raise my voice and I could have just nodded and smiled politely to keep the peace. I feel guilty that I made bfs mom cry and now she’s saying that she won’t come to the baby shower to not bother me.
Short update: I spoke to my mom a couple of hours ago. She apologised and said that upon reflection bfs mom was out of line. I talked to her about my boundaries and I think we’re in a better place.
Bf went over to his parents house to chat about last night and they apparently want to have dinner next week to talk about things. He said that he reiterated again that we don’t need/want name suggesti... keep reading on reddit ➡
My partner and I are having a baby in September. He had a sister that passed away in a car accident and she was born Sept 12th, and ever since we found out about my due date of Sept 16th hes been saying he hopes the baby comes a little early as they would then share a birthday. This is extremely weird to me, to the point where I want to have my baby in August because i want my baby to have nothing to do with his sister. I dont want to be selfish but this is my first child and i dont want it to be over shadowed by someone ive never even gotten the chance to meet. Not only that but i have had a name picked out for the baby if its a girl since i was in high school because its my great grandmothers middle name and have always loved it. His mother interjected that this would be better suited as a middle name for my baby and I should name my baby Grace or Gracie if its a girl because thats what her deceased daughter wanted to name her kid if she ever had one. I dont like that theyre making my baby more about the dead sister than about the baby itself. Im not budging on the name as i have had it picked out over ten years and its MY child. So AITA for wanting my baby to be an individual and not have anything to do with my partners dead sister??
Edit: Partner was perfectly fine and agreed my name was a good name for our child until his mother said what she had to say about it. My gram isnt dead and he loves her. Also when I say my baby im referring to his mother and it not being her child im fully aware that my partner has a say and its his baby too.
I accidentally banged a few odd sizes of closet rods together, and yeah, I'm making chimes now.
However, despite the absolutely beautiful tone I get out of these Chinese Chrome plated dog-turd bars, I'll need to carry forward with something more weatherproof.
Looking for a 1" (roughly) OD. Probably going to do a pentagon at 48, 36, 32, 26 and 18 (or whatever length produces the sound I'm after.
Any material to chase down to give a stunning, clear, crisp tone?
Our friend (my girlfriend introduced us but we’re also good friends now) Zenovia is a huge watch enthusiast. She’s not all that wealthy, and comes from a relatively poor eastern European country, so she usually has to save for several months and most of her collection are things from Seiko, Timex, Invicta, etc.. I think her best watch is a Tutima IIRC, and she had to save for like 8 months to buy it.
Before my mother passed, she decided to give her jewelry to me after she passed. I don’t have any sisters or anything, and my dad didn’t have any use for it. I told her that she should just give it to my girl cousin’s because they’ll probably have more use for it than me, but she said that I could just give it to one of my friend’s or something or save it for if I ever had any daughters.
Anyway, for her birthday I decided to give Zenovia one of my mom’s fancy watches: a really nice piaget. She appreciated it a lot and was absolutely ecstatic, but afterwards my girlfriend was livid. She was extremely upset saying how she couldn’t believe I would give another woman a $59000 piece of jewelry when I’ve never given her anything of that value, how that's inappropriate, etc..
I pointed out that she was being unreasonable for several reasons:
Its extremely weird that she had been appraising my dead mother’s watch and knew how much the watch costed
I actually didn’t pay anything for it, it was given to me for free
That’s just the listed price for new one, not necessarily the price for one that’s been used before
It’s not hers to give away, she shouldn’t get a say on what I do with MY mother’s stuff
My GF is still very mad that I did this and still doesn’t she think that she’s in the wrong at all. I think she’s being completely ridiculous.
Me (43F) and my wife, Jenni (45F), had two children. Nick (17M) passed away 2 years ago after an accident. And Megan, the youngest (15F).
Some facts to better understand the situation:
My wife is a high school teacher in the field of mathematics. Jenni teaches at the same school my kids went to all their lives, so at some point she would teach them.
Nick was excellent in many subjects, but his biggest strength was math. And to be honest, it was Jenni's greatest pride, having a partner who loved math as much as she did. The news of his death devastated our family in an overwhelming way, but Jenni managed to get worse (if that's possible).
Megan is more into the artistic and human field, with a lot of difficulty in math, physics, chemistry (anything with calculus actually and if genetics is to blame, then it's totally my fault).
Sometimes, because of Megan's math grades, Jenni lets it slip that she wishes she were easier to deal with in this matter like Nick (I always correct her, but sometimes she escapes and even in front of Megan).
Jenni started teaching math to Megan this year and I know that Jenni is a teacher who doesn't take it easy on assignments and exams. So you can imagine how Megan's grades are in math (7, 6 and the worst was 1).
Thishappened on Monday's test and Jenni insisted that we both talk to her, as it's likely she'll fail this subject if she doesn't improve.
Jenni was scolding her about her grades despite tutoring her and letting it slip about Nick and how much easier he had it.
Megan melted down and said "Mom, I'm Megan. I don't understand this subject, I doubt I'll use this shit besides college entrance exams. So if you want good grades, go to Nick's grave, because I'm not him. Stop being abusive."
They even argued and I didn't get in the way. Somehow, I was one who take The blame for the situation. Jenni saying that I allowed this behavior from Megan and didn't scold her for mistreating her own mother. In addition to allowing her to speak like that about her dead brother. And she's been mad at me ever since.
I think that despite being hard and have a better way of doing it, it's a valid feeling from Megan and I do think Jenni screwed up for making comparisons even though I warned her to stop.
Here are some necessary extras:
Extra 1: I don't live in the US, different class system. The whole class walks together in the matter, regardless of whether someone is more advanced or not. S... keep reading on reddit ➡
About this item Sympathy Wind Chimes:Express your heartfelt sympathy with our sympathy wind chimes. The sentiment at the sympathy wind chimes says: “Those we love don't go away, they walk behind us everyday. Unseen, unheard but always near, still loved , still missed and very dear.” The wording on the sympathy wind chimes offer wish, comfort and healing for loss of a loved one, and make it ideal sympathy gift for a grieving buddy or family member. Memorial Wind Chimes: Send the memorial Wind Chimes as unique memorial gifts to help deal with loss. The soothing tones of the wind chimes create an atmosphere conductive to calming the thoughts, reducing tension, and uplifting spirits of a grieving pal or member of the family with loss of mother, father or husband, brother., and so on. The wind chime becomes a precious remembrance in loving memory, to help them bear in mind all of the recollections and valuable moments spent collectively. Bereavement Gifts Ready to Gift: The sympathy wind chimes come securely packaged in 14.5x5.5X2.30 inches elegant black container with paper wrapped and every of the 6 tubes movie bag-covered internal. Ideal and considerate bereavement presents for sympathy, condolence and funeral. Funeral Condolence and Remembrance Wind Chimes Ready to Gift: The sympathy wind chimes are black with sentiment printed in white. Each wind chime is beautifully packaged in upgraded carton box. Ready to gift as bereavement gifts/sympathy gifts for your convenience. Overall length: 32”, Longest Tube: 13.4", Package weight: 1 lb. Better than Flowers: These memorial wind chimes are well made from metal top,Five surface coating treatmentsaluminium tubes and a strong S shaped hook. All the wind chimes are properly treated to make them weather-resistant, allowing the wind chimes to hold up well for years at outdoor. The remembrance wind chimes are better than flowers in several reasons: They could last for years; their deep, rich tones are mind calming and spirit-uplifting; the sentiment is heart touching.
I’ll try to keep this as simple as I can. My parents are divorced and when this story took place I lived with my alcoholic dad. Almost all of the chores and cleaning duties were done solely by me, so if I ever got sick the whole house would be an absolute mess in under 24 hours. I never got a break. My dad didn’t have a job at this time so there’s no good reason the house gets messy because of me.
Now for what caused this. My cat (had him for most of my childhood and was my first pet and best friend) wasn’t doing well, and my mom and I thought it would be best to put him down. It was a really tough decision to make, but he must’ve been in his mid 20’s and he just wasn’t enjoying life anymore. Honestly one of the hardest things I’ve done in my life was being with him when he was euthed, but for many reasons I’m glad I did it. So cut to two days after all this, and I’m still utterly heartbroken and grieving 24/7. My dad gets fed up with me and says this to my face: “You seriously need to just get over this already, it’s just an animal and you have far more important things to do than to sit in your room being lazy. Now get out of bed and clean, now.” Now I understand this didn’t effect him as much as it effected me, but it was so uncalled for and a horrible thing to say to a grieving person after only TWO DAYS. This cat means the world to me and it felt like I lost a part of myself that day. And guess what? I had to completely stop my grieving to give him what he wanted otherwise I’d be severely punished. Hooray!
For those who are concerned about my living situation, you don’t need to be. I recently moved in with my wonderful fiancé and I was finally able to grieve and move on as much as I could have with his support, and my life is far less stressful now that my dad isn’t in it.
Have generally had a friendly relationship with the neighbours next door to the left of us here in Australia. We live in pretty close quaters (330sqm blocks of land each so no real space between fence and house).
Recently theyve decided to put up a wind chime down the side of their home (1m away from our living room windows). Seeing as our windows are essentialy made out of tissues the clanging sound has no trouble penetrating through out our entire home and even into the bedroom. This is on a normal day, i look forward for the day the wind picks up...
I went over to their place for a beer and politely informed them that the noise is quite distracting and even waking up my wife at night and asked if they would consider moving it or removing it. The reaction i had was of polite amuesment "oh is it really that loud?". Evidently the chime is a gift from their son and theyve decided down the side of their home is the spot they like and the fact it bothers us isnt a problem. I understand that its their home and they can put up whatever they like but am i being a jerk for pushing this?
I’m being called an asshole and also being told it’s my decision to make and I’m so confused. Sadly my husbands mother passed away in the beginning of November. We didn’t find out we were expecting until the end of the month. Everything has been fine these past few months but ever since my pregnancy has progressed things have gotten horrible.
We found out it was gonna be a girl in January and ever since my husband is dead set on naming the baby after his mother. He said he's so happy to have a girl and it’s a sign to honor her after her grandmother she’ll never meet. The problem is I don’t really like the name. It’s a bit old fashioned and classic and it’s not even close to anything I would want. The name is something like: Paula, Carol, Joanne, Cynthia, Francine (it’s one of those). Not a hideous name but not my style or modern honestly.
I told my husband that perhaps we could have it as a middle name and that suggestion upset him. He said who goes by their middle name and that no one would know it except for whoever processes her paperwork and us and he wants it as her introductory name. I didn’t want to argue about his mom so I let it drop but after seeing him buying baby clothes with the first initial of the name now I’m beginning to worry.
I sat him down last week and told him that we still haven’t chosen on a name yet he realizes that right? He said that he thought we did. I said no. We got into an argument and he said he doesn’t understand why I’m being so evil and that it means a lot to him to name his daughter after his mom. I said that I understand that but I don’t like the name. It was hard to say but I said it. After I said that he got silent and stormed off.
We didn’t speak unless it was extremely important this entire week and he broke the ice last night saying we need to revisit the conversation. He asked me which names I wanted and I told him. He said that they are all nice, but they have no sentimental meaning and aren’t important like his name is. I brought up the middle name compromise and he got upset again. He said he’s seeing me in a different light and that he didn’t know how selfish Im being over a name and he can’t believe this is causing so much debate. He said that I have been horrible during this grieving process and left. I called my sisters crying in a FT call and one says I’m being so over the top about not liking the name and I can live with it, and the other says she sees why I don’t like the name and doesn’t se... keep reading on reddit ➡
I’m looking to use some scraps that have been laying around the shop to make some windchimes for Christmas presents. I’ve got a good set of forstner bits and a jacobs chuck.
Are there any kind of shaft extensions for forstner bits to extend them approximately 12 inches so I can make the tubes for the windchimes?
If I’m going about this the wrong way, please let me know what/how you would recommend.
I (26F) and my boyfriend (28M) have been dating for the past 6 years. We live in an apartment we bought together for 2 years now and had been planning on getting engaged once he finished an important work project.
Five months ago, however, my bf and I received the horrible news that his twin brother had passed away due to a drunk driver. This broke my bf, as he and his twin were extremely close. He fell into depression for months, and could barely get out of bed to eat or shower. I tried helping him through his grief the best that I could, preparing meals for him, bringing him anything he needed, and just sitting with him while he cried.
Slowly he started to feel better, and while he is still very much in pain, he’s started resuming his usual day to day tasks like cooking/cleaning and going to work. Another thing he has started doing is visiting his brother's dog, which his brother had adored, at his brother’s girlfriend’s (30F) apartment where it had been living temporarily since his brother’s death. I think the dog really helped him with his grief and made him feel closer to his brother.
So, fast forward to this Friday night. Bf told me his brother’s girlfriend was becoming too busy with work and wasn't able to look after the dog anymore, so she gave it to him to keep. Now, I have pretty severe cynophobia (fear of dogs). When I was 7 years old my mother moved in with a boyfriend who physically, sexually, and emotionally abused me until I was 9. He had a large dog that would bark and bark and bark while he did those things to me, and I have associated that trauma with dogs. With the help of medication and extensive therapy, I have made vast improvements with my phobia, but I still cross the street when I see someone walking their dog, and loud and repeated barking can still give me panic attacks. My bf knows about my PTSD and phobia and had always supported me through it.
I asked him if he was really keeping it, and he said he couldn’t get rid of his brother’s dog. He said it was the only thing keeping his brother’s memory alive, and getting rid of it would be like losing his brother all over again. I told him I was sorry but I couldn’t live with a dog, and he said that it wasn’t very big and was pretty quiet and that I could at least try. I yelled that it didn't matter, if I couldn’t even be on the same sidewalk as one there was no way in hell could I live with one. He called me an asshole for “not even being willing to try, and not understanding h... keep reading on reddit ➡