Just a little irritated and venting here, and wondering how much this bothers other people.
COVID destroyed one of the valves in my dad’s heart, and it caused him to constantly dump fluid into his lungs on top of having inflammation from COVID. Because of this, my dad’s surgeon—who’s one of the top cardiothoracic surgeons in the country—was very honest that he may not be able to be taken off the ventilator after surgery, and gave him about a 50/50 chance of making it.
Due to this doctor’s amazing expertise, as well as the talents of the four other specializing physicians, nurses, surgical staff, etc, my dad lived through the surgery. He’s even doing better than his doctor expected, and I’m incredibly happy about it.
But the only person that my family has thanked this entire time is “God”. They keep saying how good God is, how much he’s blessed our family, how he saved my Dad’s life. Not once have they said how grateful they are to his surgeon or any of the amazing people who are actually responsible for saving his life. Yesterday when they were all going around saying this shit, I interrupted and said, “I think we should probably thank Dr. _____ since he, you know, is the one who literally saved his life. We all know he’d be dead if it weren’t for him” and everyone had something to say back to argue this.
My favorite was, “God’s the one who blessed him with the skills needed to save your Dad”. Like no, the doctor literally devoting his life to his practice with years and years of hard work is what saved him. And you’re spitting in his face by crediting some being you can’t even prove exists.
I didn’t bother arguing because it’s just not even worth it. But I’m wondering if anyone else has similar experiences, and what you said back if anything.
Edit: This got way more popular than I’d ever have expected. Thank you everyone for your supportive words, thoughts, and good wishes for my dad and family. More than anything, I’m just happy that he’s okay. Thank you also for the awards.
It’s been great reading all of your responses 💙
Hey everyone, I am a 30 year old German gastrointestinal surgeon currently working in the United States. I am a surgical resident at a German Hospital, with roughly 18 months experience, including a year of Intensive Care. I started doing research on inflammatory bowel disease at a US university hospital in 2019. While still employed in Germany, my surgical training is currently paused, so that I can focus on my research. This summer I will return to working as a surgical resident and finish my training and become a GI surgeon. The plan is to continue working in academia, because I love clinical work, research and teaching! I was a first generation college student and heavily involved in student government and associations - so feel free to also ask anything related to Medical School, education and training!
I have witnessed the past two years from two very different standpoints, one being a temporary resident of the US and the other being a German citizen. Witnessing a Trump presidency & impeachment, BLM, Kobe Bryant, RBG, a General Election, a Biden-Harris presidency, police violence, the COVID-19 pandemic, the assault on the US Capitol on January 6th, and the COVID-19 vaccine rollout has been quite a journey.
Obviously I am happy to try and answer any medical question, but full disclosure: none of my answers can be used or interpreted as official medical advice! If you are experiencing a medical emergency, please call 911 (and get off Reddit!), and if you are looking for medical counsel, please go see your trusted doctor! Thanks!! With that out of the way, AMA!
Alright, r/IAmA, let's do this!
Edit: hoooooly smokes, you guys are incredible and I am overwhelmed how well this has been received. Please know that I am excited to read every one of your comments, and I will try as hard as I can to address as many questions as possible. It is important to me to take time that every questions deservers, so hopefully you can understand it might take some more time now to get to your question. Thanks again, this is a great experience!!
Edit 2: Ok, r/IAmA, this is going far beyond my expectations. I will take care of my mice and eat something, but I will be back! Keep the questions coming!
Edit 3: I’m still alive, sorry, I’ll be home soon and then ready for round two. These comments, questions and the knowledge and experience shared in here is absolutely amazing!
Edit 4: alright, I’ll answer more questions now and... keep reading on reddit ➡
Hello there! My name is Kevin and I am working as an ENT (ear nose throat) surgeon in a big German hospital.
I am a resident and working as the head doctor of our ward and am responsible for our seriously ill patients (please not that I am not the head of the whole department). Besides working there and doing surgery I am also working at our (outpatient) doctor's office where we are treating pretty much everything related to ENT diseases.
Since our hospital got a Covid-19 ward I am also treating patients who got a serious Covid-19 infection.
In my "free time" I work as lecturer for physiology, pathophysiology and surgery at a University of Applied Sciences.
In my free time I am sharing my work life on Instagram (@doc.kev). You can find a proof for this IAmA in the latest post. (If further proof is needed, I can send a photo of my Physician Identity Card to the mods).
Feel free to ask me anything. However, please understand that if you ask questions about your physical condition, my anwers can't replace a visit to your doctor.
Update: Wow! I haven't expected so many questions. I need a break (still have some stuff to do) but I try my best to answer all of your questions.
Update 2: Thanks a lot for that IAmA. I need to go to bed now and would like to ask you to stop posting questions (it's late in the evening in Germany and I need to work tomorrow). I will try to answer the remaining questions in the next days. Since this IAmA was so successful I will start another one soon. If you couldn't ask something this time, you will get another chance.
If doctors talk about their vacations to Europe or Southeast Asia, which new car they're buying, their child's private school tuition, or things that allude to wealth while in a normal conversation over surgery, does it make you feel uncomfortable? Do you feel like it's tacky? Is it alienating?
as a serial killer defending myself in court, i got to be both.
I got to thinking about this recently because I recently watched an indie film that’s gaining a pretty significant cult following as time passes (it came out a few years ago). The lead actress in the film was one of the most STUNNING women I’ve ever seen, and a pretty talented actress, too. Once the film ended, I looked her up on Instagram since I was so curious to see more of her.
I was surprised and pretty saddened to see she got an objectively “bad” nose job since the film came out. The comments on her page (on her newer pics showing the change) were overwhelmingly asking what happened to her nose, that they were so sad she changed her adorable nose. Some of the comments were actually cruel to her about it (one actually said, “You went from a 10 to a 4”). That was way too harsh and incredibly unnecessary, she’s still cute, but nothing like before where she was STRIKINGLY beautiful (indeed, part of the movie’s plot revolved around her being physically gorgeous). It just all begged the question of why she would even bother touching her face.
A lot of actresses have Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD), a recognized disorder in the DSM. We’ve seen this story many times with many actresses - constantly seeing yourself on film definitely messes with you in this sense. But in this case, I wonder if this particular actress made this decision because of possible severe depression, as her mom had died shortly before this happened. Could her mourning have clouded her judgment? Was this surgeon ethically sound to operate on someone in such a mental state?
In any case, BDD can definitely give way to plastic surgery addiction if left unchecked and untreated. And plastic surgery addiction is a real problem - we look at people like Jocelyn Wildenstein or Michael Jackson and utterly condemn those results as well as any surgeon who would operate on them. So why would it be such a stretch to have a qualified and compassionate mental health professional act as a mediator/voice of reason in this regard? Both of these people were clearly struggling deeply with mental illness - therapy could have likely helped them significantly more than surgery. The end result was ultimately their disfigurement and not an improvement in their mental state.
And this actress, IMO, ruined (or at least slowed) her career just as it was getting traction. She’s now known for a “bad nose job” and not her work. She wouldn’t be the first. We get mental health professionals involved for other major e... keep reading on reddit ➡
As a layman I just can't get over the sexualizing of Angela's breast reduction for Michael's approval. He didn't seem to properly communicate with Angela clearly about the post-surgery result (she seemed taken aback and disappointed), and he and Angela went on an IG Live while he was in surgery. I don't know if medical professionals can weigh in here; any thoughts?
You go in for one thing and before you know it you’ve been negged 30x.
I had one procedure done and I now understand why so many people become botched.
I was offered and heavily pushed to do 5 additional procedures. I said I was fine with my results and my surgeon replied “Well I’m not!”
He negged me so hard, he was visibly irritated when I told him I was happy with myself. On their ig page they preach that their job isn’t shallow because they “make people feel good about themselves” BS.
I just wanted to say that If you plan to see a surgeon you need to go in with clear boundaries or they will talk you into a face transplant.
If I took his advice and spent $15k on his procedures I would look visibly insane. 6 total procedures to my face at 30 is not the move. He tried very hard to make me feel bad about myself to line his pockets, he doesn’t care if I look botched.
Edit to add: don’t judge anyone who gets plastic surgery obviously but I’m never getting it done again. The experience felt dirty and unethical. I know I signed up for it so I take blame too.