I don't mean the stepfather of one's parent; I mean someone who married one's grandmother later in life. I'll explain: Both my biological grandfathers passed away years ago, and both sets of my biological grandparents divorced well before I was born.
For context, my father's parents (we'll say Bob and Jill; not their real names) divorced when he was 12. He and his brothers lived with Bob, and Jill remarried to Harry. Bob, my father's father (my biological grandfather) died when I was 2, so I've really only known Harry as my grandfather on my father's side of the family, even though he is not my father's stepfather. What's the word (if there is one) for Harry's relation to me?
Is JUSTNOstepgrandmother a thing because OH my god this lady makes my life hell and has for 15 years.
It started off with comments like "she's not really your sister" to my half sisters. Then she started saying I was there to spy on her by the FBI. Then she said if I was going to live in her house (my family had to move in) then I had to set and clear the table every night, but I was not allowed to eat with them because we aren't blood related. She started singing "Cinderella, Cinderella," as I cleaned her house all day every day to let me know I was the unwanted half sibling to her grandkids. She even got my younger sisters to sing it with her while they watched me clean because they didn't know any better. At this time I was around the age of 8, but lived with her for 5 years. I did THIS for 5 years. I even had to sleep in a BUNKER in the basement on the floor until winter came and I could use the porch furniture's cushions.
Yesterday my mother called me (we are almost at NC) to... keep reading on reddit ➡
I was having lunch with my parents and my step-gran yesterday. As conversation turned to my younger cousins being on to their second pregnancies and likely to more - all very stuck in the breeder mentality. I commented that my partner had discussed it and kids were 'not for us' and our plan was to enjoy our dog... and more likely to end up with a sled team!
My Gran's response was a blunt - "Good! Honestly if I had my time over and knew then what I know now, I wouldn't have had children. I grew up in time where that was what you did. I'm so glad you don't have to". Then proceeded to say she believed our plan for a sled team was 'wonderful' and kept asking when she could dogsit our current floof.
The conversation continued on to how much children were simply expected when she was growing up, and how the world is still very tethered to this idea - but she was much more optimistic this changing as the world has more people choosing their own path over a LifeScript. I feel lucky to be... keep reading on reddit ➡
Let’s get to the context before you hang me. (Also all swears have been replaced to make it more reader friendly). Warning context: StepGMa broke up Grandpa’s first marriage through means of an affair. We tolerate StepGrandma for Grandpa’s sake but it’s strained.
Recently, one of my cousins and his girlfriend announced they are expecting a baby, and my aunt was so excited because she has been hinting at wanting grandchildren. My cousin and his girlfriend know the gender, but only told his brothers and his mom, my aunt.
During a call with my step grandmother, she was complaining about how it was horrible that she can’t see her great-grandbaby, and how no one has asked her how she is doing. She then complained:
“I even heard that they know what my baby is going to be, but no one will tell us! It’s broken Grandpa’s heart! Don’t people know how hard it is for us during this virus? What if my baby gets sick and is miscarried? I will never know how to properly mourn them.”
I lost it. I... keep reading on reddit ➡
My Grandma and Grandpa have had a really rough year. Their youngest daughter and my grandma’s sister passed away within months of each other. My grandma is in her 80s and my grandpa in his 90s. Between her grief, isolation due to COVID19, and general financial stress, my grandma fell for an elaborate scheme on facebook. The person friended her, then sent her messages, promising cash in return for amazon gift cards. Somehow this person walked my grandma through buying $2500 worth of giftcards, scratching the activation codes, taking photos of all those codes, and sending them those photos, along with photos of accompanying receipts. I myself haven’t seen the full exchange of messages, but my Dad has. The person even sent instructional videos.
We found out about the scam this afternoon, when all the transactions occurred on Friday. My Dad and his siblings have been in the process of helping my grandparents with many things, including their finances. In trying to help them with this mon... keep reading on reddit ➡
(I think this is the sub where we post things like this? I've never fully understood what goes where.)
My cousin and his wife recently moved to the city where these people were found, and she sent me this link. Apparently there was a huge manhunt for the children a few days ago. The part of this that I find the most upsetting, personally, is how freely these assholes admitted to their motive. It shows just how convicted they are that their actions are correct, justified and socially acceptable. It appears they expected to get away with this.
Quoting from the article:
"Authorities say the boys’ step grandfather took them with the help of their grandmother. The grandmother allegedly kept the boys’ mother inside against her will at the Tekamah Motel, where several family members were l... keep reading on reddit ➡
I feel really strange asking the internet this but I’ve never had someone remotely close to me die, I’ve also never sent a letter before as it’s not really something my generation does. Normally I imagine most people just say “so and so was very dear to me and I’m terribly sorry for your loss” but obviously it’s my loss too and that just feels a bit strange. My step grandmother is a wonderful woman but we’re not all that close which makes it a touch more awkward for me as well.
So I guess I’m just wondering what one should say in this type of situation.
edit: thanks for all the well wishes and advice. I perhaps was overthinking it but I combined a lot of the comments on here with what felt right in my heart and that made it much easier to write.
My grandmother went from healthy to bad to worse recently and there's speculation she doesn't have long left. She's too weak to really go anywhere and my parents are understandably shaken. Trying to help them square things away.
Grandmother has a living will and my mom is seeking power of attorney. What else should we be doing/keeping in mind? Anything that can be done prior to the inevitable? Really out of my element here so advice is appreciated.
Context: I love her to death and I find this to be absolutely hilarious and don't hold any grudges against her. She's old and set in her ways and I know I can't change anything.
I'm buying a house with my bf and needless to say, no one on my side is happy (because age and also not being married.) My realtor had two of my three grannies visit the house. After a while, one called me to tell me how it went and this was part of the conversation.
"Well... do you plan on getting married?"
"Do you plan on having children?"
"Well alright, just make sure if you get pregnant that you're married. You don't wanna have bastard children."
Okay gramma, I'll make sure to take my pills on time.
The kicker here is that I'm literally the bastard cousin of my entire family. Both sides and all. I'm just glad she didn't bingo me.
Here's another post about my aunt and grandmonster. You've previously read about them in several other posts.
My mother and my dad met through mutual friends and soon fell in love.Since grandmonster was obsessed with maintaining complete control over her son's life, (she saw it as the only way to secure her future as her husband, my grandpa, had left her for her sister) she did not like this one damn bit. Surely if another woman came into the picture, her son would stop taking care of her. It's not like my dad was a decent human being who would always be there for her (/s in case it wasn't obvious). She tried every trick in her arsenal to try to tear them apart, from lying to my mom that dad was cheating on her to denouncing my mom as a "loose woman" because she sometimes played tennis after work. My aunt aided her in her attempts, because that cunt just couldn't bare to see my dad happy. But despite all of their nefarious designs, my mom and dad got married.
My mom was a Provinci... keep reading on reddit ➡
Okay, so the backstory on this, me and My grandmother, step-grandmother that is my actual grandmother died when I was two. Never had a good relationship She just doesn't like me. She would get mad at little things, and I lived with her for 3 yrs the end of that was because of me, this is how it went: Today, which was a Sunday. (We always cleaned on Sundays) I and my cousin who was also living there got to cleaning the whole house, things were normal until around lunchtime. I was getting distracted and not doing the best job because I was concentrated on lunch, so I asked my step-grandmother "Whens lunch?" she was like "It doesn't matter." so I continue and I muttered under my breath 'Well I guess I won't bother her about it' but I guess that was little too loud so she jumped up from her chair and was like "WTF did you just say?!" I told her 'nothing' but she got mad and said I was grounded and then she took my phone. This got me a little angry/sad so I took my phone from her and thr... keep reading on reddit ➡
My step-grandmother was born in a little Polish village in 1933. When the Germans invaded in 1939 their village, which was predominately comprised of Jewish homes and businesses, fell under the German occupation zone. My step-grandmother's father, who was a member of the town council, convened with his colleagues about whether to cooperate or resist the invasion. Most of the council decided to cooperate, as they didn't believe that in the 20th century they would be killed by a first-world country. My step-grandmother's father was more skeptical, however, and that night he took his family away with only one suitcase each. (The very next week, I was told later, that village was razed and its inhabitants murdered).
They walked three days to reach the Russian occupation sector, but were received callously. The Soviets at the time were [suspicious and intolerant](https://en.wikipe... keep reading on reddit ➡
Edit: wow. I just want to thank everyone for all of the support and love. It's seriously overwhelming and made my week. Growing up around JNG was a struggle and still is at times, but I'm really thankful for this sub and knowing I'm not alone. Much love everyone!
So I've been posting a bit recently about my step-grandmother JNG. In an earlier post I mentioned my JY Dad, who is JNG's step son. That got me to thinking about their relationship, and man is there one story above all others that really cements what a POS she is.
My dad's actual mother, who I am named after, died of cancer when my dad was in his early twenties. I never got to meet her, and was born about a year after she died. Before my grandmother died, she bought my dad an extremely nice watch as a last gift; she probably spent about five grand on it. It's beautiful and he wore it pretty much everyday after. My entire childhood I don't think I ever saw my dad without it; that watch was absolutely his most prized possess... keep reading on reddit ➡
Insert obligatory ‘mobile user’ here. INFO: My grandmother passed Jan of 2018. My grandfather was already remarried and moved in with his new wife by December of the same year. I live with them, have all my life.
SM=Step grandmom GF= grandfather
We used to host huge Christmas parties, and go ALL OUT with lights. Every room had lights, every inch of the house was decorated. It was a huge family tradition. When I turned 12 I started helping put up said lights.
This whole thing started when I found out SM didn’t like Christmas. We aren’t religious, and she is. She resisted putting up ANY lights, but GF managed to get her to bend enough for us to put up about half of what we usually do. She however would not allow a Christmas party.
Tradition in my family is the “kids” (20 and under) get to open one gift of their choosing the day before Xmas eve, and then we do dinner and gifts on Xmas eve itself. My mum and siblings drove all the way from flordia to Ohio to participate in Christmas... keep reading on reddit ➡
When I was a child of perhaps eleven me and my family went to visit my elderly grandfather down in Louisiana. He had recently remarried and we were all very excited to meet his new wife. She lived in an old mansion that had been partly turned into a museum. She had traveled all over the world with her first husband, had become a pilot, and had a grand display of all of the movie stars that she had flown around back in the day.
There was a erie calm to the place. A darkness that no matter how many lamps were lit or lights were turned on, the rooms remained dark and hard to peer into.
She proudly gave us a tour of the house. Except for the attic. I remember jokingly asking if it was haunted or something. I remember seeing a uncomfortable expression briefly flash across her face. She did not seem to want to reply to that question. She finally said just don't go up there, it might be dangerous, before swiftly adding because of the old flooring. I looked at her hard, trying to get more... keep reading on reddit ➡
The principle that כל דמקדש אדעתא דרבנן מקדש ואפקעינהו רבנן לקידושי מיניה - anyone who marries, marries with the agreement of the Rabbis, [therefore] the Rabbis [can] invalidate his marriage (BT Gittin 33a) can be used in certain cases, such as those enumerated on that page, to invalidate retroactively a marriage, even when there are no biblical grounds to do so.
However, the Gemara also states that חייבי לאוין תפסי בהו קדושין - A non-severe prohibited relationship is a legally binding marriage (BT Yevamot 20a), for example, step-grandmother. This is a marriage that is clearly not condoned by the Rabbis, yet is still a valid marriage.
Therefore, if a person were to marry such a relative - for example, their step-grandmother - the principle in Gittin would not apply, and a Beit Din would not be able to annul this marriage unless other halakhot applied.
This happened a few years ago and I still cannot wrap my head around this incident.
During the summer before my sophomore year, I was spending a few weeks with my dad and stepmom over in their apartment. I had been having some trouble sleeping that night, so I decided to just say fuck it and started watching some YouTube on my small TV. As I was laying down, I noticed something in the corner of my eye, when I looked over I saw someone standing right next to my bed. Keep in mind, we lived on the second floor and I had blackout curtains in front of my window, there was no reflection of light anywhere so this wasn't a weird trick of light or anything. This was a tall skinny woman, white dress, pale skin, and somewhat long dark hair. Once I looked away from her I felt paralyzed for what felt like hours but was probably only for a few minutes. I couldn't move my head or any part of my body and it felt like someone was sitting on my chest. Once that whole thing was over I told my friends w... keep reading on reddit ➡
My dad met my now step-mom when I was about 17, I am now 26. My step-mom and I are close, probably closer than I am with my actual mom.
I only see my step-mom's family at family events (Thanksgiving, Easter, Christmas, etc.). I have never shopped/gotten presents for my step-grandmother, we are friendly, but not close in any way probably since I never really see her.
As an adult, I am in the step-mom's family Christmas draw where instead of buying gifts for all the adults in the family (step-mom's brother,sister, their spouses, parents) everyone pulls a name and buys a gift for that one person with a $50 maximum. One year I pulled step-grandmother's name and so I bought for her that year but aside from then, I have never bought her anything. And even then, I went shopping with my step-mom to figure out what to get her.
I still buy presents for my blood grandparents, but they're usually little/homemade gifts. We don't have a draw on my dad's side of things and i have always gotten... keep reading on reddit ➡
The start of this story goes pretty far back, but it's still ongoing, and I've never gotten this off my chest. Thought this would be a great place to do it, but it's pretty long and sort of haphazard (sorry!!). Here goes...
My maternal grandmother passed away in 2006, when I was 6 years old. I remember all the nice little things she used to do for me when I was little, but I'm sad to say that I can't remember much about being close with her, just because I was so young and didn't know her for long. From what my mom tells me, she was a saint. She was basically the pillar that held together the entire feuding family, which pretty much mostly fell apart after she died.
Here's where the story starts. My grandfather remarried a couple of years after, to this lady we'll call G. I don't remember much about meeting her for the first time, or what my first impressions of her were, again because I was pretty young. But as I got older, I started to see what kind of monster she really is.
My... keep reading on reddit ➡
My estranged grandmother passed away this morning and was found by her mentally impaired son. My mother and I are currently going to pick him up and take him back to his group home, but we have no idea what we need to do regarding his mom.
We will be going to the hospital to grab the death certificate (if they didn’t give one to her son), but what else do we need to do? We are unsure if she has a will.
1.) who is the executor in this situation? 2.) does anyone have resources I can read to help guide my family in this cluster situation?
Hi everyone. Apologies for the longish post.
My grandmother is fairly well down the road with Dementia. She can't remember anything beyond 20 seconds at best or where she is most of the time, however for now she recognises family although it takes a little while. I launched POA (not sure on the correct phrase) for her financial and health matters.
On the financial side I visited her main bank with her and now have POA on her accounts . She has £65k spread across eight accounts (couple of ISAs and the rest are just random current accounts). I believe she has another account with another bank with £15k in it (haven't visited that one yet to set up the POA though).
In terms of other assets:
From a practical perspective, I'm going to combine her money (keeping it below the £8... keep reading on reddit ➡
Hello long time lurker here! Hoping I might get some help with this situation.
Per the title my grandmother  has gotten caught up in an inheritance scam and has already sent the scammers 70k (I understand this is likely gone). She is attempting to send them ~230k total and has asked my mother to help her secure more money in order to unlock the account holding the $2 million 'inheritance'. She has gone to two banks where she has accounts and received loans (unsure of the amounts- this information is second-hand). The scammers are now pressuring her to quickly get the money now that they know she has told my mother.
In order to secure the loan, Gma told my mom she put her savings in a money market account to serve as collateral. Can someone explain this? Is this a thing?
Is there anyway to stop ( or slow her down) her from going to another bank and securing another loan on the grounds of mental incompetence or some sort of policy to protect against elder financial abuse? Could... keep reading on reddit ➡
I (M21) have practically known her my entire life. She was always Nana to me. We haven't had a bad relationship or any at all. I rarely saw my grandfather, he was in SC and I'm in Ohio. He unfortunately passed away due to cancer in June of 2018. At the time, I was working with Americorp making money for a trip abroad to Europe. I was fortunate enough to get time off to see my grandfather before he died. I didn't really think anything of it. I figured he would bounce back. About 2 weeks later I get a call from my dad. It was one of the saddest times I've talked to him. My heart sank. He passed away less than 15 minutes ago. I'm honoured my dad chose me to talk to first. I'm his first born and I think weve always had a close bond.
However during that time in the hospital, some not so nice things were passed around. My dad accused my grandfathers wife of basically not caring for him. The cancer could've been prevented if caught early enough. He had a spot on his back for months she was... keep reading on reddit ➡
So, I hesitate to even post here because I’ve been blessed with such a lovely family, but my step grandma left me fucking gobsmacked yesterday.
So basically, yesterday, my mum and I made dinner together yesterday for my step grandmother’s birthday, and so my grandfather and her came over, and also my mum’s boyfriend.
Throughout the night, she got fairly tipsy, but she can’t have drank too much, because the only alcohol there was 1 beer and 1 bottle of wine. They drink wine every day, so, split between the two of them, that’s not too much.
Things were fine, then we were leaving, and my butt was kinda eating my skirt, so instinctively my mum’s boyfriend fixed it (this is not something I’m concerned about, he’s pretty awkward about touch and doesn’t really know where a middle ground for touch is) and said “you’re a little short!” (Explaining why he was fixing my skirt), then my mum jokingly said “yeah, it’s impossible not to be a little short in this skirt!” (This is also fine, this... keep reading on reddit ➡
Just needed to get something out from this weekend and see about advice out there. My oldest son (10) plays baseball. Yesterday we were at a tournament with a break between games. He's one of those kids where his nerves flare up his stomach. We spoke and he decided he was going to eat, at most, some toast or something between games. My mother was at the field and happens to live close to it. I ask her to take him to her house so he can be in the air conditioning between games and cool day. I say, specifically, the most he can eat is toast and she agrees.
They return to the field and he's upset. He tells me she made him lunch including a sandwich, which he eventually throws up in the bathroom. After the game, my mother comes over and says to me she needs to explain, that I shouldn't be angry. I replied what I had asked her before they had left and that she needed to respect that and that, as crazy as it sounds, I know my son better than she does. She didn't see a problem in anyt... keep reading on reddit ➡
My grandfather remarried after his divorce, which was many years ago. So I have a grandmother and step-grandmother on my father's side. This divorce and marriage took place before I was born. I'll call her SGM from now on.
The relation between SGM and my dad was never really warm, their personalities don't really match. She's very much a 'keeping up appearances' person. But we got along ok.
In the last few years, the health of my grandfather was getting worse. He had difficulty moving around, and become forgetful. SGM was playing martyr loudly, how much she had to sacrifice for him, and how much she did for him, and how my father wasn't nice enough for her, and how he didn't visit enough. My grandfather always chose her side. At some point, there was even no contact anymore between my father and him and SGM. My father decided to give in because he figured out that his father wouldn't be around for much longer and he wanted to make the most of the time that was left.
So my grandfa... keep reading on reddit ➡
First time posting, let me know if this situation belongs in a different forum!
My mother’s stepmother has been a bit JustNo in our family for a long time, for a multitude of reasons; my parents, sibling and I have been very LC since her husband, my grandfather, died about 10 years ago. Recently the rest of the family, my mom, stepdad and half brother, went full NC. I try to manage her, as I feel kinda responsible for her, she invested a bit into my early education and she doesn’t have any other relatives. So I’ve been trying to keep the peace by making sure that my step-grandmother doesn’t decide to just show up at our house to try and force contact with the rest of the family, but her constant barrage of hateful comments about them are really wearing me down. I try to explain that things are complicated, that she doesn’t have to like their decisions, but must respect them, but it’s always the same with her. I don’t want to go full NC as I think that it will only exacerbate the iss... keep reading on reddit ➡
I know step-grandmother really isn't something people say. However, she is my mom's father second wife. She is not the women who gave birth to my mother but was married to my grandfather before I was born. I did call her grandma while growing up.
I want to start off by saying my family is simple small town minded people. I don't think they are intentionally racist or bigoted, but rather a product of their upbringing. Maybe, I hold it against them.
My grandma died today. I don't feel anything about it. I am not sad, nor do I want to go to the funeral. I haven't had a real conversation with her for 20 years. My family says I must attend her funeral and I am not going to.
I am gay to start off. My mother and step-father are born again Christians (nothing bad about that). However, my mom was ok with me being gay when I came out at 17. However, she had an affair and she and my step-father came back together with the help of their religion and church. Since then, she has not been ok wit... keep reading on reddit ➡
18K gold, small but high quality diamond center Stone with 3 accent stones on each side (one of which is missing). Just curious about initial steps I should take and how much I can expect to spend to get it back in great shape. Any tips appreciated!