Throwaway because I don't want this seen on my main account.
I'll get straight to the issue. My M43 17 year old son Adam has been trying to become independent and preparing to move to college but was struggling to find a job.
I own a private warehouse as a side job to earn a living. My wife suggested I hire my son to work at the warehous. Moving boxes, brining workers lunch, helping with cleaning that kind of stuff. She said it is for both of our benefits since he couldn't find a job and we needed to hire someone new.
I agreed and Adam was so happy and excited to start working. We agreed on the salary and work hours so he still has time to study and practice. The first couple of weeks were going fine. That is until one day. The workers were moving boxes (computers) into the warehouse. The client wanted them to be stored for a few days and we already arranged before they arrived. It was all written down including the number of computers we stored.
In the evening while I was checking I noticed there was one computer missing. I gathered all workers except for Adam and they had no idea and thought there was a mistake.
I brought it up at home and Adam told me that he saw one of the workers putting a box in the garage to take home with him. I was confused since he couldn't specify which worker it was. He eventually gave me a name. And I went to talk to the worker. He denied it and I ended up giving him X time to bring back the box and then I'd discuss why he did what he did. The worker is a single dad with 3 kids I've known him for a while and I wanted to give him a chance. The next day I was busy my daughter was in the hospital and I got back to the warehouse at 8pm and it occured to me to check the cameras, what I saw was Adam putting a box in the back of his friend's car and then the car left. I knew his friend and knew Adam stole the computer.
I went home and I confronted him. My wife sided with him when he denied it and after arguing for hours I fired him and told him he was lucky I didn't call the police. this was my responsibility the client entrusted me with his computers and Adam stole on the Job. Adam started crying. My wife said I was wrong for firing him. That it was extreme and should've just took from his salary. She refused to drop it and tried to convince me to hire him again but I refused.
I apologized to my worker and I told him if there's anyone he knows who needs this job I'll be more than happy to hire them. He brought his brother an... keep reading on reddit ➡
Please hear me out first. I'm a single mom (45) of a 20 year old son (Chris) Chris is in college. He studies engineering. Being a single mom at a young age was not easy for me. Despite everything I been through. Despite my own family giving up on me. I made sure my son got the life he deserves. He was/is my everything. I worked several jobs that were different from eachothers. I was able to own a home after years of renting. And more importantly I was able to provide Chris with an opportunity for education.
Recently. Chris moved back in with me because he no longer could pay rent. His next semester is starting soon. And he's been talking to me about the possibility of selling my house and buying a house in the city where he studies so he will no longer pay rent and said that it was better to move. I declined for several reasons; 1 grew up here, my old friends live here. 2 the city is expensive 3 this home means a lot it represents my hard work and sacrifices.Chris didn't like that. He threw a fit and kept brining it up trying to convince me to do it. Last week he kept pressuring me. I told him that I found a potential job at a company and it was an opportunity because I been looking for 3 months. He took as in I don't want to move because of my new job. But it's not true.
Yesterday. I found out that he contacted the company and cancelled my interview and then deleted my email. I use a computer and it's in the office so he gets access to it. He told me he wanted to check his college website for some reason and I thought nothing of it.
That was the night before. I found out yesterday morning that someone cancelled my interview. I confronted Chris about it. First he denied then he said that the company wasn't what I deserved anyway and I can find a better position when we move to the city.
I was so mad at him for ruining this for me and pressuring me to move leaving me no choice. I felt as if he was trying to sell the house from under me after he said he found a potential buyer and just wanted to make things go smoothly and all I have to say is yes.
I yelled at him and argued with him telling him that he was an adult and should manage his own issues. Told him to get a job but not expect me to turn my life upside down for him. He yelled back saying I was selfish and I ended up kicking him out of the house. His aunt knew and was yelling at me for what I did saying I was treating him poorly and he was hurt by me.
Just to clarify his aunt is my sister. She... keep reading on reddit ➡
I F32 lost my son to SID at the end of November. He was only 5 months old It was unexpected he was our first after awaiting for 4 years. This was so devastating. My heart feels heavy I can no longer hear him laugh/cry/watch his dad play with him. The house is empty and I barely find the energy to get out of bed because my family needs me.
I spent Christmas with my in-laws. My family weren't happy they insisted that I come to celebrate New year's eve and eat dinner with them. I found my aunts who have been very supportive and we talked. My husband apologized for not attending. My brother went on about how disrespectful my husband was for not coming and how he was treating my family like they were less than but that's not true.
Before dinner was ready my aunt talked about my son and wanted everybody to take 3 minutes of silence to honor him. In exactly 15 seconds my sister in law got up and said she wanted to tell the family something. everyone was looking at her. And she announced that she and my btother were expecting. My aunt and I were stunned while everybody else got up and congratulated her. It was very disrespectful to do that. I didn't move from my seat. She kept staring at me until my mom told me to go hug her and congratulate her and my brother.
Then my sister in law smiled at me and said She wanted me to answer "some questions" about my son's death after dinner to know "what went wrong" and prevent it in the future. I lashed out at her and told her she was disrespecting me and my son by talking like that. She felt defended and kept asking why I was talking to her like that. My mom told me to knock it off. My brother said nothing he just looked upset. I got into an argument with my mom and sister in law. she told me to not treat your sister like that and ruin the night for the family. . I left before dinner.
My mom called my husband and told him that I ruined the night with how I reacted to the news and that everyone lost their appetite because of unnecessary stress caused by me. She sent me a text saying that my sister in law found New year's eve as the perfect opportunity for the announcement but I was sad and petty and ruined their night and needed to apologize to my brother and his wife because they were incredibly upset for ruining their year and their joy.
I just want to mention that my husband was so mad and said that he would've put everyone in their place if he was there when they berated me and hurt me like that. I don't know what m... keep reading on reddit ➡
I have a deceased son named Adam. Adam passed away 2 months ago, he was only 21 years old and was suffering from a chronic heart condition. He introduced me to his then girlfriend when he was 19 and told me they were expecting a baby and wanted to get engaged. I supported them with all I could although I still helped with medical expenses. He was working a job/studying/paying bills. He was exhausted but excited to be a dad and he loved his son more than himself. Three months after his son was born Adam's condition got worse he spent time in/out the hospital. He was in a wheelchair he was too weak to walk but was aware of what was happening. His fiancèe moved back with her parents. After my son requested to see his baby she declined and didn't allow it. She didn't even visit just called.
I talked to her and told her Adam was at my home and she should come see him and bring their baby with her. She came but only to give back the ring saying this was too much for her and will not live like that. She said she wanted to move on and provide for "her" son. My son was devastated. Next thing we knew she flew out of country before we could even consult a lawyer. We knew nothing about where she was. All means of communication were cut. It was hard watching my son sad missing his son. All he had of his baby were pictures. He was devastated. He was melting like a candle in front of me and I stood there helpless.
I got him a medical device because he had trouble breathing on his own. Two months ago he was admitted to the hospital. He had last stage heart failure and was on a vent-machine . The doctor was honest with me and said that Adam was too weak for another surgery.I was devastated I let the family know what was happening. Including Adam's friends.
Turned out one of his friends was in contact with Adam's former fiancèe on social media and told her. Next thing I knew she was standing infront of me wanting to see Adam. I was surprised to see her. I politely told her to leave but she insisted she brought mutual friends to try to convince me but I refused I got mad I had to get the security Officer involved and she ended up being told to leave right then.
She started yelling at me and told me I had no right. Called me cruel and other names I can't say here. Adam's friends sided with her and were yelling at me too. I felt too much pressure.
Adam passed away later that day at 6pm. I couldn't take it. I found myself dealing with her and their friends yelling at me ag... keep reading on reddit ➡
It’s a bit of a complicated situation right now. My wife and I got married 13 years ago. I had a son from my previous marriage who was 15 at the time and my wife had a daughter who was also 15.
The kids were already older and we never believed in pushing them to bond if they weren’t interested in that. They had their own separate lives before we married so there was no point in forcing them into something.
I’m guessing you all know where this is going.
Two years ago, my son and stepdaughter (now both 28) sat us down and confessed they have been dating over a year. It was a bit strange for me hearing this, but I was respectful respectful of their relationship. Although it did take a while for it not to feel weird for me anymore. I did always consider my stepdaughter like my own and we’re very close.
My wife was upset at first but she worked it out by believing they would break up eventually.
Now that they announced they’re engaged and plan to have a small wedding in a couple months, my wife is furious. All phone calls to her daughter have been my wife demanding they “break up” and keeps telling her it’s not “natural”.
This has upset them both and my wife declared she’s not going to their wedding. We had a huge fight because I couldn’t believe she would refuse to go to her own daughter’s wedding over this.
It’s not like this came out of nowhere, they have been in a serious relationship for years so she’s had time to get over whatever weirdness she feels about it.
I finally told her that she needs to get over herself and if she refuses to go then I will simply go without her. She’s now mad at me for not having her back on this and acting like what she feels doesn’t matter.
My wife says she’s allowed to not approve of their marriage and as her husband she thought I would have her full support on this so she feels in a way betrayed that I’m not taking her feelings into consideration.
But..it’s also my son’s wedding and I would never miss it. Things are very tense and she’s still telling me she’s hurt by my actions and that I would willingly go to something she’s not comfortable with.
I’d like to know if I am being TA for perhaps being too dismissive of my wife’s feelings about this. I understand why she’s feel weird, but like I said she’s had time to get over it so I don’t know.
I'm a single dad with 3 sons. In order: Jack 23/Austin/19/Kevin16.
Kevin has a severe learning disability, low-functioning autism. I look after him at home, after he was failed by 3 care homes. Because there was neglect.
The the last care home hadn’t managed to wash his hair in four weeks or give him a shower in three weeks And other problems that were never addressed, and a complicated argument with SC who were awful and nasty. I couldn't let him live like that. Jack and Austin both live at home. They didn't want him to return home. And were being negative towards him. They said since he's back home they won't be involved in his care. I'm not sure why they want this for their brother to be treated as less just because of his special needs. I know it's not easy. For them. Kevin and me but he's their brother.
I started looking after him myself. Routine has changed but I managed at first. I started working from home so I could spend more time with him. But it didn't work also because I'm solely taking care of him and everyone else in the house doesn't help with simple tasks. It's just exhausting to be doing everything alone.
I decided to hire a paid carer that takes about 600 Weekly. Austin and Jack knew about it and they were upset with me. Asking me why I was spending that much money on Kevin alone and demanded equality and be given the same amount of money weekly too. I was stunned when they both lashed out at me for playing favorites and treating Kevin differently. Saying he was my spoiled favorite. They started complaining about needing money to fix their phones/new tv/a new dishwasher etc.
I told them that I had no choice since no one wanted to participate in his care. And that they're capable adults who can start earning their own money if they wanted. They said they weren't obligated to take part in his care. So I should stop holding that over their heads. And demanded that I give them the same amount of money weekly. We argued back and forth. And they both took turns to try to guilt me for what I did.
They refused to drop it and other family members got involved. My sister berated me saying I was being unfair and that their reaction is understandable. They're both 23-19 they can move out if they want. At least they don't pay rent nor groceries. The argument seemed to be going nowhere. They've been giving me the silent treatment since then and say that I'm playing favorites.
I need to mention that I in no way asked or expected Jack and Austin... keep reading on reddit ➡
I 37M had experienced 2 loses in a short period of time. I lost both my daughters (bio9/adopted14) both suffered from chronic conditions. I was a single dad dealing with so much. Soon as my oldest passed away. My youngest got sick in the same year. I had no time to grieve I found myself driving to the hospital again. Talking to doctors again. It was a difficult time. My youngest passed away a year later in 2018. My family started talking about how I needed to move on. My brother told me that I can rest now that I'm no longer spending time with doctors and worrying about my daughters and their issues. That hurt me even if he was trying to comfort me. My mom wanted me to get "another chance" to have kids but I ignored her My dad suggested that I move out of my house but I told him I was comfortable enough to sleep at my house since he thought I should run from memories.
I'd spend most of the time by myself. I met a parent just like me in group therapy and we begun talking. He's a struggling dad with a sick child. I met his son Adam and he's such a sweet soul. They both begun visiting me. Adam reminded me of my daughters he is 16 and he's smart & empathetic. Hes a good cook for his age he cooked for us a lot and he brought books and would help care for my plants. He's at the hospital now.his dad and I spoke about the surgery he needed. Their need for money. I decided to help out by using my youngest daughter's emergency fund to pay for surgery. This gift is from my daughters to Adam. He couldn't believe it and started crying because they've been struggling to come up with the money for months and it also affected education. He stopped going to school for a year.
I received a card from Adam. It's heartwarming. I haven't told my family but when they visited me my brother brought up that he needed money to renovate his house and how he has no money. Mom brought up my youngest daughter's emergency fund and asked me if I could help. I told them that I've already given the money to a close friend and paid for his son's surgery. They just stared at me. Then Mom and brother started yelling at me for doing that. That I was out of my mind to give away the money that was supposed to go to family who's struggling. They brought up how supportive they've been and I was ungrateful. My brother called me an asshole for handing people "I barely knew" money and not my own family. I told them to drop it or leave. They kept berating me and I yelled back at them and told the... keep reading on reddit ➡
My father, who I was extremely close with, passed away nearly 10 years ago. He single-handedly raised me and was literally my best friend until the day he passed. Even though 10 years have passed, I still miss him every day.
After a few months of dating my boyfriend (who we will call Kyle) we had our first discussion about kids and I told him that a dealbreaker for me was to name my son after my father. I didn't want the middle name, I wanted it to be his first name. Kyle said that was a beautiful sentiment and that he fully supported it. I told him if we ever had kids, he has free rein to name the girl whatever he wanted.
Well, I'm now pregnant with my second child with Kyle. Our first one was a girl, and much to our first discussion, I let him name her whatever he wanted. In his family none of them have middle names, so we decided to stick with that with our girl. However, we just found out I was expecting a boy. He was super excited, until I started ordering stuff with the baby's name on it.
He asked me why I was ordering stuff with the name Brian, and I said it was obviously because that is what we were naming him. We had that conversation over 100 times at this point, so it's not like he just randomly forgot. He said that he thought I was kidding and that we shouldn't name our son Brian. I said he got to name our daughter and I never once complained about the name, so I don't know what he's going on about now. He said he's always wanted a Kyle Jr or Kyle the second or something like that, and I said that's great but you promised that we could name our son after my father.
Well, he called his family and they are all calling me complaining about the name. They don't care about my dead father's name and they want something that will match my daughter (more modern) or a Jr. They said Brian is a really bad name for kids today and he will be bullied. I disagree, and even if he was, he is still named after the most special person I've ever met.
I have no family left on my side. The last person was my father. No grandparents, no parents, no siblings, cousins, etc. All I have to carry on my family is his name. I'm willing to budge on the spelling if I HAVE to, but they just want the name completely gone. A middle name is not even a discussion anymore because they don't want to break tradition on their side.
I understand it's not a popular name. However I feel like this is something that is so precious to me that I will not budge.
Edit: Just to cl... keep reading on reddit ➡
I'm sure a lot of you already know the story but it still strikes me as this strange controversy all its own.
Quick rundown: LaRoche would have his son with him close to 100% of the time. He had his own locker, hung out in the players' clubhouse, took part in on-field drills, and traveled for away games. This was actually a stipulation in LaRoches' contract prior to signing with the Sox.
At some point Ken Williams asked him to tone it down a bit..which he didn't. Drake LaRoche standing on the mound in the middle of infield drills would lead to the climax of the story: Williams, infuriated by this sight told LaRoche the privileges would be revoked. He promptly retired leaving 13 mil on the table and the White Sox players enthusiastically supported him and publicly voiced their anger towards Ken Williams.
EDIT: The clubhouse was actually somewhat divided over this. Chris Sale and Adam Eaton supported LaRoche. Not sure about the rest.
My husband and I have a 6 year old son, Sam. Sam is super affectionate to me, because I am super affectionate to him. For practically his whole life we’ve had cuddle time every night, I tuck him in and give him hugs and kisses, I put him on the bus in the morning and kiss him goodbye, and when he doesn’t feel good I let him curl up with me on the couch and hold my hand. So it’s not uncommon for him to randomly tell me he loves me, or come plant a kiss on my forehead while I’m just sitting down - This is just how we’ve always been with each other.
By contrast, my husband isn’t a very touchy feely person and therefore our son doesn’t show him the same affection. Don’t get me wrong - my husband is a great father and Sam loves him, but he shows his love with tickles, and wrestling, and Sam climbs all over him like a human jungle gym. That’s their kind of love.
Today Sam wasn’t feeling well so I kept him home from school and we cuddled. When my husband came home he kept trying to cuddle with Sam as well, but he only wanted me. This made my husband feel bad (understandably) and said that it looks like Sam loves me more than him. I told him that’s not true at all, but that kids emulate the behavior that they experience, and since husband isn’t affectionate most of the time (there are definitely some times where he is), Sam isn’t affectionate back because he doesn’t associate that behavior with his father. I told him that Sam shows him love when they goof off with each other.
My husband said that I am making him sound like he’s a bad father and that I should force Sam to give him hugs and kisses, but I refused because I think Sam has the right to choose who he is physically affectionate with. He apparently vented to his mom and sister, who have both taken his side.
So Reddit - am I the asshole?
Sorry for the title.. I wasn’t sure what to title this.
This seems like a no brainer to me but in real life I’m finding myself in the minority of that opinion.
I have one bio son (17m) from my first marriage and one step son (19m). They both work part time in retail, and they started around the same time. My current wife’s son started working first due to age and just landing a job first.
When my son started his job I started taking 30% of his pay. I matched it 100%, so if I took 150, I added another 150 to it. I never told my son why I was taking his money, and I understand that may be wrong to some people, but I stand by my decision. He knew I was putting it away but wasn’t clear on why.
My wife and I don’t mix finances. She was in a past abusive relationship, and so I refused to push that subject however I did tell her I was doing this, and asked her to give it some thought for her child.
My wife kind of shocked by it and felt I was doing something terrible by taking his money regardless of the reasoning behind it. She didn’t pass harsh judgment or treat me differently but she certainly thought it was unusual and unnecessary.
Well, my sons birthday 18th is in two weeks and he’s been talking about a car, and how much he could afford. I laid the entire thing out for him and let him know his budget was much larger than he was thinking. No rules as it’s his money but I had an opinions if he would listen.. if not, irrelevant, it’s his money.
My son was ecstatic and I have to say I about cried when I saw him tear up and freak out. First time my nearly 18 year old picked me up and nearly broke my back from a hug lol.
Well when my step son heard about this he felt it was unfair and my son was being favored. His mother felt the car my son had chosen was unnecessary, and I could help her son with a vehicle—by stealing from my sons fund. I refused and told her that was ridiculous, and she had the same opportunity that I did. She’s now saying because my sons education is paid for it just makes it less fair. His grandparents are paying for college so I think that argument is moot.
My son has told my wife and his step bro that most of the money is from his personal checks, and they aren’t getting a penny of that furthermore as the money I added they should be arguing between themselves in regarding why his mom didn’t save while she could had. Her parents and some friends have brought it up, and my laughing has turned to anger. I’m getting sick of it... keep reading on reddit ➡
She tried to protest, but his voice grew forbidding, “Mary, I will not take no for an answer.”
This evening my husband 42M and I 40F got into an argument with our 17 year old son. He told us at dinner that he needs our signatures to drop out of school. We know that he has been struggling since remote learning started last year. We have worked closely with his school to develop an IEP and he goes to therapy three times per week. His school has implemented everything that his therapist recommended including reduced assignments, more time on tests and frequent breaks during lectures. I have even cut my hours down to part-time at work so that I can be home to help him when needed.
He told us that if we won't sign the paperwork that as soon as he turns 18 in May, he will sign the forms himself and drop out. My husband asked what plans he had if he were to drop out such as work, living situation and transportation and he said he was going to stay here so he wouldn't have to worry about any of that. We both told him that if he dropped out of school that he would not be leaving here, that he would have six months in which he would need to find a job, a place to live and his own transportation to get back and forth from work. We told him that if he is going to make the adult decision to discontinue his education that he would need to be able to support himself, because we would not be doing that.
My husband (a mason) knows several people who are looking for apprentices in HVAC and as an electrician but our son says he doesn't want to do that kind of work. He says he wants to make his living as an influencer because he can't work for other people.
We told our son that our decision stands, that at this time he has three choices; graduate and get a job/go to college, graduate and work a trade or leave.
Our son called us both "stupid assholes" and told us "we don't understand that he doesn't want to work like dad."
AITA for telling our son that if he drops out of school he has six months to move out?
Henry was doing maths homework, saying to himself...
"2+5, the son of a bitch is 7"
"3+6, the son of a bitch is 9"
His mother heard this & asked, " Henry ! What is this nonsense you are doing?"
"Oh Mom. Don't disturb. I am doing my maths homework"
Mom: "Is this how your teacher taught you?"
"Yes mom "
Infuriated mother picked up her cell phone and called the teacher:
"Are you teaching maths to children by saying... 2+2, the son of a bitch is 4?"
There was silence for a moment
Then the teacher started laughing :
"What I taught them was... 2+2 THE SUM OF WHICH IS 4."
I [35F] have two sons [10M and 8M]. My sister [24F] is an animal educator/conservationist, she does shows at schools with animals to teach kids about the environment and conservation.
My sons and I visit her frequently and she sometimes babysits for me since she has no children/works from home currently. She has a lot of animals in her home. Mostly reptiles (I don’t know the specific breeds but things like snakes and lizards). She says all of them are “completely harmless.”
My sons are OBSESSED with them. Every time they go over, they play with some of the animals my sister has. This bothers me, mostly because wild animals are unpredictable and dirty. So I had a conversation with my sister and told her that my sons are not to be around or play with the animals anymore when they visit.
My sister was surprisingly unhappy with this and tried to argue my sons are genuinely interested, the animals are harmless, and she supervises them at all times. I stood my ground and said no, I’m not comfortable and it needs to stop immediately. I’m their mother so what I say goes. So she finally agreed.
The next time we went to visit, my boys wanted to see the animals. My sister apologized to them and said “your mother is not comfortable with you being around the animals.” I was furious! She put the blame on me completely and made me the bad guy. She couldn’t have just said “sorry but you can’t see the animals today” or something like that? She had to pin it on me!
My boys are now extremely upset with me and my husband is taking my sister’s side. He says that if the boys are passionate about the animals then we should allow them to explore it. I disagree, they are still too young and animals like snakes and lizards are unsanitary and unsafe. If they got bitten or pooped on then what? I am trying to protect them!
All of them are making me feel like an asshole, so I need an outside opinion.
He was born on 12/12/12.
Edit: it's 12/12/12 for the non-Americans.