I've been with him for 9 months. We're both about 22yo.
For the first 4-5 month he was unemployed, doing nothing at home while I was working on a construction site, it was my summer job. I would come back, sometimes after a 14h day and he had done nothing. I had to clean his messes, dishes, laundry, everything while he was watching netflix. I sent him job applications to fill, I paid his bills, food and debts. If I ever asked him to do anything it would take him sometimes even two weeks to do it and even then he would wash about five spoons and tell he's done his part. It feels like I'm living with a child.
Now he's working a few days a week which is better than no work at all but he's still not helping me. I've been studying in an uni again this spring and the online lessons are draining my energy even more than the construction work. I'm really getting tired of doing everything all the time. After christmas break he promised he'd do the dishes. There was a lot of them piled up but it wouldn't take more than an hour to get them all clean. I decided I wouldn't do any dishes before he had washed them all clean. Well, it took him two weeks. Lately if I've asked him to do the dishes he'll just remind me how he did the dishes for two weeks and he's done his part for a long time. During that time I was still doing everything else in the house.
Now the thing why I'm being accused of being the asshole is when he promised to do the dishes again today. I asked him about three times today if he could go and wash them and when he finally did he asked what I'm gonna do while he's washing them. I was super exhausted and needed a break and just answerd that I'm just gonna chill on the sofa. He said it's not fair and it makes him feel bad if I'm not doing anything. I anwered that now he knows how it feels. I told him I'm not his maid or mom, I'm his girlfriend and sometimes I need a day off too. He got pissed off and now I'm the bad guy.
I know this is more of a rant because he really pissed me off but I guess I also wanna know if I'm the asshole like my bf thinks or not.
So reddit. AITA?
