Looks like it just recently ended. What's going on?
I have been with my BF for 6 years and we have 2 sons. His baby sister (25) just ran into some trouble 3 months ago and is now looking at 25+ years in prison because she was dating a guy who was a drug dealer and when his house was raided, she was charged right along side him.
Now, my BF and I just took our entire savings (15k) and put it toward lawyer fees for the past 3 months. I begged to not go with that lawyer because I did not like anything about him. There was a lawyer $10k cheaper who was far more intelligent and worked these cases before but his family had to have this younger lawyer who was more expensive because "you get what you pay for"; with the promise they would throw down cash to help us pay this $35k. Low and behold his family hasnt done jack shit and neither has the fucking lawyer. His two oldest sisters are insurance agents and make over $160k a year. His two brothers also both have great jobs and both make nearly $120k a year. My BF and I have a combined income of maybe $80k a year, if that. Which is the reason why I am infuriated that we are the only ones doing anything. We also are the only one with kids.
So, I called his family up and said we needed a family meeting. We agreed to meet up last night at his eldest sisters (42) home. When we got there, I lit right in to his family about the fact that they are watching us put ourselves into a hole to save his sisters ass, all while guilting us to do more and that I was fucking done. I told them that from here on out if they dont start pulling their weight and hold up their end of the bargain than their contact with the lawyer I paid for will be terminated, we will not be giving them updates or keeping them in the loop. If I'm going to be the only one paying, I'm going to be the only one speaking to the lawyer, basically. All of the sudden his family is saying they dont have the means to help and that I am trying to "strip them of information they are entitled to" and "using money against them". As I said, all of them are wealthy with no kids. My BF was on my side last night but after his sister called him and guilted him some more, he now is on his families side, regardless of them literally doing nothing and is saying that I'm being childish about the whole thing and shouldnt have ever said anything.
im so pissed. I kicked her out now. We lock downed for the second wave again and churches are closed. Last week while at work she managed to go to a church meeting. Getting Covid. And she cares for my 9 month old.
Last night the baby got very sick and couldn't breathe well. I rushed her to the ER. Turns out she has covid 19. They asked if i got the virus. Its no as i dont work with people been a freelancer for marketing but i have my own office as the baby cries too much. I come home crying when mom says its her and she was feeling ill but cane alright and after a test today is qurantined. I luckily didnt get infected.
Im crying as i think imma lose my child because of religion and their stupidity. Why must they behave this way?
will keep you posted
Pretty much just the title. I have no one else to tell so im just posting here.
I brought it up to her earlier this week, lots of tears were shed. its a shame because in almost every other area we agree on the subject. But I know she wants to have children and im not going to ask her to sacrifice her "dream" however much I disagree with it.
good vibes to everyone out there. Peace.
Edit: Apologies for my lacking replies for a bit, im on my way to the meet and greet now. I'll keep you all posted.
UPDATE EDIT (didn't plan for this to be so long TLDR at the bottom): I have read through every single comment and I know this is stereotypical to say here on reddit but I genuinely thought this post would die in the mess that is "New."
That said I want to that everyone for their kind words and encouragement on this matter virtual hugs to everyone!
On to the recap of the meeting. It started off really rough not gonna lie. there were no harsh words spoken between us we truly just didn't know how to proceed. We went back and forth sharing our logic for each stance in an inquisitive manner, not accusatory or aggravated which was nice.
We chatted for about 2 hours in a restaurant and never touched our food. (rip $25) we both came to the conclusion that we didn't want to break up (some might be rolling their eyes right now which is warranted and valid but hear me out.) I never tried to push my agenda onto her but she admitted she hadn't really thought about it seriously either, and that she was only saying she wanted kids because that is the status quo. I told her I was planning on getting a vasectomy and her first response was "well thats reversible isnt it?" I replied that in some cases it is possible but its not something I would want to do. and that if I really felt strongly enough to change my mind in the future I would rather just adopt.
I suggested we take a beat and go our separate ways and find out what we each really want in life. but again neither of us really felt comfortable with that idea. I did ,however, remain steadfast in my opinion that we should go our separate ways, that isuntil I checked with my gut. in my head I ran through both scenarios, the one where I was alone again made me feel sick to my stomach. whereas the scenario where we remained together while she sorts through her own consciousness put me at peace.
All in all I'm aware that chances are really high we are just going to break up in the future, and I'm prepared for that (... keep reading on reddit ➡