I (22f) live with my best friend “Brooke” (23f) in a 2 bedroom apt. Brooke owns the apt, but I pay her rent & utilities to live in the spare bedroom.
Brooke is a HUGE health/fitness nut. She goes to the gym for hours almost every day and only ever eats healthy food and counts every calorie. I love how motivated she is, but I’m not really suited to that lifestyle. I exercise a few times a week and try to eat nutritiously and am generally fit, but I suffer from depression, meaning I find it difficult to be as active and disciplined as her. When I moved in with Brooke, she made it clear that she wanted me to adopt her lifestyle. She hates sweets, fried food, etc. and didn’t want them in the apt.
This was going well at first, but with so much going on in my life and my depression worsening, I found it hard to keep up with her regimen. She started counting my calories along with hers and criticizing my eating. I developed major body image issues. Every time I told her it made me uncomfortable, she insisted that she was only looking out for me.
This is where the depression cakes come in. I LOVE cake. It makes me feel better when I’m depressed, so I’ll occasionally buy a small one if I’m feeling rough. Knowing her feelings on junk food, I’ve been keeping my cakes in a small cooler under my bathroom sink (she uses a different bathroom). On my bad days I’ll lock my door and eat a slice. If she asks I say I’m journaling bc I know she’ll shame me for being unhealthy.
A couple days ago she went into my bathroom to look for toilet paper rolls. That’s when she found my latest depression cake. She confronted me about it, furious. Said I was ruining my health and throwing away the work she put in to help me. Most of all, she was angry that I lied to her and kept the cakes a secret knowing they were banned in her apt.
I feel terrible for breaking her rules in HER home, but also it’s just cake and I think it’s unfair of her to tell me what to eat. She demanded I throw away what’s left of the cake, which I did, but I’m genuinely confused if I’m at fault here. AITA?
I'm not talking about ruining the day for the birthday boy/gal/non binary person. It ruins the party FOR ME. I came here to eat cake, and I'm sure as hell I'm not the only one that thought the cake looked delicious.
But no, an asshole thought it was funny to completely destroy the cake because of some tradition.
I have legit seen people destroying the cake with the face of someone else. And I have also seen moms or the birthday boy give pieces of what's left of the cake. The hell, I'm not eating that. It has your boogers and your dead skin all over.
Stop wasting cakes for a stupid tradition. Let me eat cake, dammit.
Ps. No, I'm not buying two cakes.
Edit: For many people confused, this is a fairly popular tradition here in Mexico and I have seen many friends choking on cream or almost getting blinded with candles. So I guess my thoughts would be unpopular here in my country lmao.
EDIT: Save your money and do not give this post awards. There are many places you can consider donating to benefit transgender youth in your community. Please consider doing that instead!
My grandmother was a teen mom, my mom was a teen mom, my aunt was a teen mom, my cousin was a teen mom, and my sister (Julie F36) was a teen mom. I (23F) was the first non-teen mom in the family (and no, I didn’t get a cake to celebrate that I’m not a teen mom).
Anyways, my sister “Julie” got pregnant in highschool and had a baby girl.
Her daughter (19, almost 20) started being uncomfortable around puberty and became very tomboy-ish. Three years ago they came out as transgender and said they prefer they/them pronouns. We are very close and they have had a top surgery. They have also told me that the are waiting until their body feels like them for them to find romance (and sex).
Julie, while supportive, was also upset that she wasn’t going to have the life she thought her baby girl would have and whined to our mom for the first 3 months almost daily. Julie has come around kind-of, her boyfriend doesn’t like it but he has stayed with Julie.
Anyways: to where I may be TA. Julie said that for the upcoming 20th birthday they should get a “congratulations on beating teen pregnancy” cake.
Julie is the type to glamourize her life and talk about how much she’s overcome on social media and it’s cringy. I KNOW that the only reason she wants this specific cake is to post it online and talk about her hardships as a young mom and talk about how good of a mom she must be since her kid isn’t a teen mom/parent.
The cake Julie wants is in no way about her kid’s birthday or appreciating and celebrating them. Julie wants this cake to celebrate herself.
I was at their house a few days ago and the birthday topic came up and Julie brought up the cake to me so I said (maybe slight paraphrase) “I really think you want that cake to praise yourself as a mom and not to celebrate (NAME)’s 20th birthday. We both know they wouldn’t find it funny.”
Anyways she got extremely pissed at me and at her boyfriend for giggling in the other room. I guess he has also told her this.
(Also, I will add that Julie doesn’t like me very much. I got a dad that stuck around and “took” attention from her when I was a baby... but that’s what happens a lot of the time when a woman has a baby young, she meets someone later on and has another kid. Anyways, Julie has never fully warmed up to me so I’ve genera... keep reading on reddit ➡
Her blood-curdling scream was heard all through Wonderland as her skeleton began to grow but the rest of her body shrank.