I’m a woman here. And I’m setting the record fucking straight for all you self-proclaimed ‘ugly’ men out there. The only truly ugly thing is when your struggles in self-esteem turn into your personality, and you develop a victim mentality where you blame your inability to date on external factors rather than reflecting on yourself.
You’re no uglier than plenty of men in relationships. The only difference is your attitude, your personality built upon pitying yourself for your looks, and acting like women are unfeeling, shallow creatures who want nothing but a pretty boy toy. We’re a bit deeper than that, thanks, so get over yourself and just learn to be comfortable with yourself. You’re a person, not some pretty picture to frame. And you matter as you are and how you choose to be, not how you look.
we all get rejected for the dumbest things. there will be miscommunications. you’ll get ghosted after great dates.
you cannot let yourself get jaded or bitter from these things because they’ll influence how you think and will reflect through your actions around new potential lovers and that will scare them off (unless they’re also jaded and bitter, in which case you will both form a ball of negativity that’s probably unhealthy).
you have to get back up and dust yourself off.
your future dates will thank you for that.
talk about your passions and what you hope to achieve in this life despite all its shitty moments. resiliency. find a way to keep being fun and positive on your dates and enjoy the process.
EDIT: follow up post, https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/i9r1sh/follow_up_to_my_jaded_and_bitter_post/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
That is a very long title but yes. I’m M 24 my sister Georgia is F 22 and we have a younger sister Bri is F 15.
Georgia used to be hardcore into fandoms and stuff when we were younger but now she’s in her I’m edgy and an adult and this is all dumb phase. She’s constantly putting Bri down for her fandom interests, saying its cringy and she’ll “regret” it. She also makes edgy social media posts and fights people in fandoms minding their business. Just real existential crisis shit. It makes Bri feel like crap. Me and bri stay out of Georgia’s way mostly we don’t get along with her. we’re all living together for covid right now So it’s more apparent rn.
Bri is currently in some musical fandom and she was streaming a song or something. It wasn’t excessive and she was just having a good time with her fandom I guess. Georgia took this moment to go on her “this is so cringy I’m so glad I got past that phase ugh” rants and she went on such a spiel TO bri’s face that I just told her we were all sick of her being miserable n bitter constantly and to PLEASE get a hobby. It escalated into an argument and now everyone’s upset. My parents said “you should’ve handled it better because that was rude” but was it?? They never say shit to Georgia when she insults everything me and bri ever do because she’s so above it all. They want me to say sorry and I’m like ?
Anyone else feel like they just don't care about dating anymore? I've been single about a year and have been on plenty of dates but every time I quickly lose interest and find myself not really caring. So, instead of dragging someone along, I just end it. As a man, I barely care about sex at this point! Am I broken? Is this normal?
When I was about 3, my older brother who was 9, started calling me "ballsack piss stain". Rarely he would call me just ballsack for short (I'm female). He would usually not call me by my name. It really hurt my feelings when I was 3 obviously, it made me angry and ashamed, which made it all the more funny for my brother. My sister called me that as well, and others joined in.
Adults would tell him to stop but they would often be stifling their laughter, which also encouraged my brother. Eventually a lot of my extended family started calling me ballsack as well.
People would substitute my name for ballsack like it was a neutral name, or yell that to call for me, and everyone would laugh, but I always felt so bad. In high school a couple of my cousins would greet me like, "oh hey ballsack pissstain is here" on front of my friends if I saw them in public. No one else in my family had a nickname that spread like that to everyone.
Even today at family gatherings people still call me ballsack, my older brother especially (he's 32).
Is it childish to be offended by this still? Is it a common thing to have jokey nicknames?
I think it annoys me especially because I always had problems with really low self-esteem and I think this contributed. Obviously it wasn't the only thing contributing but it's the earliest thing that I remember that made me feel inherently disgusting.
My entire family still thinks this is funny so when I'm mad I feel like a serious, party pooper, like I take myself too seriously. Is it childish to still be offended?
I've always wondered this.... especially when a bottle of other soda has usually around the same amount, but is extremely sweeter.
I've had enough of bitter mothers complaining about childfree adults liking Disney and going to Disney world or Disney stores. Honestly, what is the point of complaining about it? It's no one's fault you can't enjoy Disney as much as us because you are stuck in line with a bunch of screaming toddlers and you want to blame it on childfree adults because we don't have to worry about that. And you can't be bitter and glare at childfree adults in disney stores when you see them buy merch of their favorite Disney series because you can't get anything for yourself but you goblin kids only. Also we are allowed to watch our favorite disney films on disney+ without hearing you guys say during this pandemic only your goblins are allowed to watch Disney+. Just ridiculous. I'm tired of seeing mothers scream about childfree adults liking Disney. Walt Disney even said it himself that Disney was meant for adults and children. I don't know if this is a common rant or not but I've seen this said a million times by bitter mothers I had to say something.
This trend towards apathy and bitterness has only progressed in the past year.
People are so damn apathetic, they just adopt other people’s bitterness and troubles as their own, while doing close to nothing about it. I’ve never encountered so many well off, yet bitter, people.
Putting a BLM yard sign up doesn’t mean anything; you’re literally just going along with the accepted viewpoints.
The culture has become this homogeneous blob of casual wokeness. Outside of the fringe guiding the blob, there’s nearly no interesting or varied discussion.
I get it, most people really don’t give a shit, and for the most part people in this city like to avoid confrontation. That doesn’t mean you have to adopt the prevailing public opinion as your own.
If you adopted a political and cultural identity simply because you want to avoid confrontation, do yourself a favor and let go of it. You adopting others frustration and bitterness, while doing nothing about it, is not making the world a better place.
Make yourself happy, it’s better for everyone.
I've post this on multiple subs before but whenever I do on either r/dating, r/datingadvice, r/australia or r/melbourne or any other discords I tend to get the following:
Tone Deaf or Useless Advice
Racist rants or comments
Say I'm the Problem
Tell me to go find a hooker
I'm just sick of getting these same posts day in and day out. And I hate it.
I'm a 24 year old 5'5" Bangladeshi guy. I've never had the chance to date or even kiss a girl and never stood a chance.
Living in Australia and Canada I can safely say my parents didn't properly understand or help me with my personal development. For most of my high school and university years I lived on borderline poverty.
More than that I was basically jobless until I landed my engineering job. I've been passed over, knocked around and basically been told no by a lot of groups and agencies despite all the effort I did put into my resumes. I've had to barter, scrape and claw my way out of borderline poverty into where I am now.
My mom once said it to me correctly.
"I remember the days when no one would even want to hire you for a McDonalds job. Because you were short and brown."
I've not only had to face off against my white peers but also my brown peers who have parents that didn't mess up their development. As a result they are usually taller then me, healthier and come from a more wealthy background.
And I'm still bitter and angry over that. It is no understatement that I've had a hard life and I'm fucking frustrated by people downvoting me or saying that my experiences don't matter.
And relationships suck for me. I've tried all the apps; tinder, bumble and even okcupid with no success. People say it's a numbers game but I've had no luck in years.
No similar luck in real life either. And I don't know what to do.
I'm happy to explain the situation a bit more
Feeling bitter sweet today about the loss of my previous baby who’s due date was supposed to be today, but I also officially hit 3rd trimester today with my rainbow baby 🌈 who is healthy and moves so much 🤍 just wanted to let this feeling off my chest.
Like most of you here, I'm watching older seasons and I just reached the jury segment for 14 and I just wanted to raise a glass for Britney who kept a rational head in dealing with the bitterness from the other houseguests (primarily Frank). Frank boasts all about how he has morals and loyalty (which he didn't, he reneged on his deal with Britney) but Dan doesn't. Finally Britney puts Frank in his place by telling him "This is a game of strategy. This isn't a game of morals and integrity. That's playing a game of Susie high horse, that's not a game you award someone half a million dollars."
I think quite a few of us agree that Dan played the best game that season and he was burned by a jury who didn't want to make him a two time winner. I think Brit's quote should be engraved on the walls of the jury house to remind the players that this is a game about outwitting your opponents.
I have always had weird feelings when getting to the last dungeon in many JRPGs I just am not ready to be done with the world and the characters. I typically take my time beating a game when I get there despite plowing through the story to get there. I recall doing this with my first serious game in the genre FFVII and ended up watching a friend beat it first at a sleepover to where I had not pay attention to the TV.
Title really but I’ve only seen it pop up once before and I didn’t win anything. Saw it again today and watched it and won £7 Xbox Live gift card credit.
For anyone who fancies their chances haha. I bought Telltales Walking Dead The final season with the prize while it was on sale.
FYI: I bought the peanut butter last week, it’s terrible. Wouldn’t recommend.
Edit: Typo in title was meant to be butter but I’m sure peanut bitter tastes great
I am always excited about reddit. This go around I did 4 and had so much fun shopping and personalizing each gift. I also received wonderful gifts from each of my gifters. What makes me sad and a bit angry is that 3 out of the 4 giftees have not posted their gifts and they have all been delivered. Since they didn't post and I'm not sure they will I had to provide shipping proof for all 3. I usually don't provide shipping proof cause I always hope people will love their gifts and post. I know I can send them a message, but why should I? They all know how this works. And after a little digging some are still actively posting on reddit and some have post gifts they received from others. I'm just appreciative for my gifts but bummed about my giftees.
Edit: It's secret santa 2020 not 2010
From how someone writes their responses and asks their questions
Is it just me or can someone else confirm?
Edit: Also victimize ourselves
Yesterday I tried my first Mate tea, with the traditional cup, bombilla and traditionally prepared of course.
However, I was a bit disappointed by the taste. The taste is really strong and very very bitter (amargo). It’s almost like drinking a big espresso. Did I prepare it correctly? Or did I maybe do something wrong? I don’t understand how people can drink this all day, considering the taste.
I even felt nausea (feeling of throwing up) when drinking, cause it was so bitter for me.
Should I try adding sugar or milk to soften the taste? Let me know some tips! Gracias!
So I posted last night on another sub that it would be amazing to have some child free places and some were supportive and others were..well...super duper fucking rude. Some even argued that’s this is the new trend. „Hating children’s“ like no?? Just because someone doesn’t want to have kids it’s not automatically turning this person into a kids-hater. Some even thought it’s discrimination towards kids what I clearly don’t see. I just don’t understand this. Why are some people so bitter over a random thought from a random stranger on the internet like gee. If you go this crazy towards a unpopular opinion maybe you shouldn’t raise kids. You seem like you can’t handle another opinion without going nuts.
Sorry. Just needed to rant. I calmed down enough to make me some fluffy ass pancakes.
Has anyone else been watching 90 day strikes back and just realized David is so bitter. Like when he responds to tweets and stuff he attacks the person instead of what they said/the jokes. It’s honestly really annoying and over the top
I get so annoyed when my husband just falls asleep in 5 minutes. We lay down and his breathing just slows and he’s off to dreamland. He has no trouble at all. I didn’t sleep all night, he slept like a baby. Now it’s noon the next day, we had lunch and he’s napping like a damn angel and I wanna slap him awake. Is sleep jealousy a thing? Is his peaceful sleep keeping me more awake? I wonder if I was with another insomniac maybe I’d be sleeping better because my brain does the opposite effect. Ugh I can’t even see anymore. So tired.
I have good friends, work out, lift, dress decently, play guitar, make over $200k a year, try to stay confident/happy, am on an anti-depressant, but am frequently miserable and self-loathing because of this. I’m lonely, horny, and frustrated. Women often reject in cruel, humiliating ways.
How should I/do you cope? What resources can I turn to? I hear people struggling/thinking in a similar way in some notorious subreddits, but I don’t want to pick up their hatred or feed my self-pity.
Long personal background, for those interested (please don't remove because of this optional life story, mods):
I’m a guy in my late twenties. I have been in and out of depression since I lost my faith in middle school. I’m on an anti-depressant. I’m introverted but generally get along well with people. I am socially anxious but will chat up everyone in the room at a party. I was bullied growing up for being short and ginger. I’ve never had it easy with girls. I didn’t lose my virginity until I was 20. I’ve had plenty of close female friends, but from my abysmal rate of success despite many approaches and attempts, it seems highly likely that I am physically unattractive.
I stay in excellent shape, groom and dress well (I frequent the tailor), went to one of the toughest colleges to get into in the world, make over $200k a year in a good career, and play guitar decently, but as far as I can tell my being 5’5” disqualifies me for 95%+ of women.
Might other factors contribute? No doubt. My face and hair might not be stellar. I try to avoid totally letting myself off the hook because of my height. I lack some of the confidence with women of more romantically successful guys (chicken and egg). But given how widespread and scientifically confirmed women’s preference and often requirement for a man to be tall is, it seems very likely that my height is the predominant factor driving my rejection by women.
As unfair as it feels that I am the male equivalent of a fat woman in the dating market when there’s nothing I can do to change my height, I understand that life isn’t fair. I don’t hold it against women.
Up until a few years ago, I approached frequently. I didn’t want to let being short hold me back. I’ve had a decent number of flings, some al... keep reading on reddit ➡
Anyone excited? What do you think the fragrances will be like? :)
Here's a pic of Bitter Peach: https://i.imgur.com/mJMeBIg.png
So, I was born into the church. I was a really good kid, I feared god with my whole self. And then, I turned out to be bisexual. So you can imagine the amount of work I had to do, mentally, to not kill myself over that.
Fast forward a LOT of effort and crying and time, and I’m now engaged to my beautiful wife, who has never stepped foot into a church, and has rejected all things religion since she was younger. Personality wise, she’s my opposite. She’s outspoken, she knows what she does/doesn’t want. She’s bold, and she has had a really cool life, free of religion. She’s older than I am, so she’s already graduated and has a pretty nice job.
On the other hand, I went to an early college program. I was isolated by my parents when I was outed. I wasn’t allowed to talk to ANYONE who was vaguely supportive of the LGBT community. This lasted for about a year and a half. It took a lot of time and a lot of lying to convince them that I was straight. After relieving them from their worst nightmare, I continued to work on my Mormon conditioning. It felt like I was leading a double life. I was always the youngest in my classes (15 to everyone else’s 18+)
I simply never had the college experience. Or any experience. As soon as I was able, I escaped to another country, to live with my partner.
So here’s my issue. My partner likes to tell me about her life, as she should. She tells me about her childhood, her college life, etc. But sometimes, when she tells me about parties (she partied a lot, and experimented with substances and stuff), I get this horrible feeling of bitterness and anger. Not towards her, of course, but more at life.
It’s so unfair. I wish I had that experience. I wish I didn’t have to hide so much of myself growing up. I wish I was able to do things regular people do without feeling immense amounts of guilt. I’m only 21. I don’t want to feel like this. I want to have fun, and I wish I had a lot of friends and a life I enjoy. But it doesn’t seem possible, because the pandemic won’t even allow me to meet new people. Or meet people at my classes. I want to stop this horrible feeling of anger and bitterness at the unfairness of it all, without going back to the Mormon belief that if you’re just thankful, you’ll feel better. Have any of you dealt with this? Sorry for such a long post, and thanks for reading.