I don't drink simply because I don't enjoy alcohol. However, I still enjoy going to bars to socialize with friends. If I am clearly just drinking water, I am always inundated with questions about why I'm not drinking. People get very nervous drinking around a sober person. I learned this trick from a friend who is a recovering alcoholic and it has made my social life much more enjoyable! I typically ask for a seltzer with a shot of grenadine. A lot of times the bartender won't even charge you, which is another nice benefit. But remember to tip them regardless!
Edit: but don't go to bars or social events during pandemic
Edit 2: I have gotten the comment many times that you shouldn't be friends with people who judge you for not drinking or pressure you to drink. I 100% AGREE. However, this is really a problem in large social circles with acquaintances, at family events such as weddings, and especially at work functions. This tip is just a way to avoid being harassed about why you're not drinking in those situations. It's particularly bad for women, who will get asked so many times if they're pregnant. Sometimes it's more worth it to just fake it than to be confrontational, especially if you want to just relax and enjoy yourself!
Not just zoom, most other softwares/apps have this βpush to talkβ feature. This will make sure that you explicitly press and hold a button of sorts to unmute yourself - reducing the chances of leaving yourself unmuted without your knowledge.
This happened a year ago, but I just remembered this horrific event and the poor victims that never fully recovered. I was set to go on an 10 hour road trip through the interior of British Columbia and with me were 2 of my cousins and my uncle. However, before our 6am start I decided the night before to wolf down these chocolate chip Fiber One granola bars that had something like 75% of your daily fiber intake. These things were crazy good and I ended up eating an entire 8 pack of them in one sitting. After that I went to sleep and woke up in the morning to a bloated stomach but felt fine otherwise. 45 minutes into our ride the cramps began. My stomach grew larger and larger and I ended up needing to remove my seatbelt, and undoing the zipper on my jeans to give it more space to expand. My cousin next to me couldn't believe what he was seeing, he said it was like the blueberry scene from Willy Wonka. I couldn't hold the gas in any longer and asked my uncle to pull over, which he did and I struggled to get out of my seat as every move was agony. I waddled to the back of the car and let her rip. A thunderous roar escaped me like an asshole racing his Harley Davidson around the block on a Sunday Morning. The gas hissed out of me as my stomach grumbled, shuffled and shuttered. I am not exagerrating when I tell you that this fart lasted AT LEAST 15 seconds. Little did I know that I had just broken the seal and I would proceed to experience uncontrollable and obnoxiously powerful farts that lasted 10-15 seconds on average, with only a brief period of relief between said farts.
The fact of the matter was that I was now experiencing major flatulence every 2 to 3 minutes, and we couldn't stop the car every few minutes to escape the smell, so we decided to roll all the windows down and allow me to let loose whenever I needed. However, we had no idea that this would become a much longer ordeal than we initially thought. Truth be told, I couldn't stop farting for nearly 7 hours, and each fart just HAD to be more epic than the last. By the time hour 2 rolled around, my anus was sore and aching, and my insides feeling like shards of glass were ripping through me. And the smell had become so overpowering that we had to stop at a gas station and buy as many air fresheners as we could. I took one of the air fresheners and sat on it in the hopes that each fart will be freshened up - instead it just smelt like rotten eggs and pine. My cousins and uncle resorted to using Vi
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They order drinks, in a thick accent.
"You two ladies from Ireland?" asks the bartender.
Offended, one of them replies "Wales!"
"Oh I'm so sorry," says the bartender, "Are you two whales from Ireland?"
"Greetings, comrade." says the spy, but before he could finish his sentence, the Russian says, "I think you are American spy."
The spy is alarmed, but being a skilled, trained, spy, he says, "That is not true! I am the proudest Soviet there is! I can sing the anthem more beautifully than any other man in the country!"
He then proceeds to sing the Soviet anthem, so melodically and beautifully, that everybody in the bar cheers.
"Very good, very good!" says the politician. "But I still think you are spy."
The man continues to keep his cool.
"I am a historian! I can tell you everything about this glorious country!"
He then spends about two hours recounting the Revolution, the Great Patriotic War, about how superior to the Russia is in terms of technology compared to America and makes a great argument about how communism is beneficial to society.
"Amazing! You are skilled!" says the politician.
The spy smirks.
"But I still think you American spy."
The spy is getting frustrated, but still unfazed.
He replies, "I am good drinker, a true Russian! Let us drink, and see who can come out top!"
The bar turns its attention to the politician and the spy, who are now in a drinking contest.
The bartender serves drink after drink of vodka.
After about an hour of drinking, the politician nearly passes out, unable to hold as much liquor as the spy, to a resounding cheer amongst the bar.
In the midst of the cheering, the Russian politician gets up, smiling, and in a slurred speech, repeats, "You are good, you are good... but I still think you are spy."
The American spy, piss drunk, loses his skill and gives up.
"Okay, you got me. I am an American. But what made you think that way, after all this time?"
The Russian politician replies, "There aren't many black people in Russia."
IF YOU KNOW YOUR MAN SO LITTLE THAT YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO GIFT HIM FOR CHRISTMAS, YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS DOOMED TO FAIL
IF I SEE THIS SHIT AGAIN, ITβS A FOUR WEEK BAN
FUCK YOU ALL
Skied at Vail today, got in line for Lift 4, which is a 6 pack... rules are that 3 can ride on a lift as long as everyone is spaced out. Me being a single rider, I joined up with 2 other guys and got on the lift and sat at the other end from them. I've been doing this all week with no complaints...
I go to put the bar down(something that is non negotiable for me since I saw someone fall out when I was younger) and one of the guys says "We don't put the fucking bar down" and I asked "Well could you do it for me?" and he then just started to go on a total tantrum....
"Who the fuck are you anyway? We don't know you. Why are you riding with us? Do you not fucking know there is a pandemic going on?"
I told him to chill out, its too late now to do anything about it, and he just went on a total tantrum, ripping me for being a tourist, saying how much he hates tourists, and how tourists refuse to obey social distancing and are going to get everyone in Colorado kiilled via Coronavirus, then just started screaming at me when I get off the lift, to just ski to the bottom and "get the fuck out of Vail, go fucking home"
After a couple minutes of me silent and him non stop ripping into me, I had enough and simply told him to Shut The Fuck Up! Then he got really mad, "Do you know who the fuck I am? Do you know who you are messing with? When we get off this lift, I am going to kick your fucking ass!"
And then I said "In front of ski patrol so you get your pass pulled?" and he said "Never mind, I got a gun in my jacket pocket, I am going to pull it out and shoot you in the fucking face!"
At this point he crossed the line... and he was angry enough to make me not want to doubt he was serious... so I took my phone out and began to call ski patrol... he then said he knows every ski patrol person and police officer at Vail on a first name basis and they will just laugh at me and side with him if I tried to report him... and then his friend said he would tell their ski patrol friends I was the violent one, and it would be their word against mine, and I would be the one to get my pass pulled...
We got off the lift and they tried to escort me to the ski patrol HQ, trying to get me to go with them... I refused, and simply skied down to another ski patrol HQ and reported the guy... took a picture and video of him... and I thought I would just be wasting ski patrol's time since I had no hard evidence, but they were pissed when I told them the guy said he knew them all and ski
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Edit: the original post https://www.reddit.com/r/LifeProTips/comments/jkkcwc/lpt_if_you_like_to_give_to_the_homeless_but_are/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
Edit 2: i meant u/dressasafrigidbitch
Edit 3: I put granola but i actually bought soft cereal bars for anyone with chewing problems
Edit 4: A lot of great suggestions in the comments for things like socks, tarps, and reusable water bottles, if you have a bit more spend!
You can check out the demo at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4zwXL7ZJra4
It's also on the website. You can sign up here: https://reslash.co
If you're interested, just reply back to this thread.
