My daughter (19F) was recently charged for vandalism, possession of MDMA and resisting arrest.
I’ve got her out of trouble multiple times and I’m tired of having to help her out of a mess that she made. I’m frustrated and incredibly upset with my daughter. So I decided to not bail her out of jail.
When I told my mother what happened she told me that I was being too cruel for keeping my daughter locked up because she’s “so young.” My mom essentially called me a shitty mother and now she has me second guessing myself.
Aita?
Been seeing a lot of secret code systems to protect ladies from dates that are not going well.
This is a good step and well appreciated.
But why is this system one sided?
Venues should offer guys a secret code system to bail them out if their dates are there only for free meal. The date is only talking to waiter and ordering expensive food/wine and not willing to split bill or pay for themselves etc. In such a case the guy can use the secret code to bail out (after paying for their meals) and the management should approach the girl/guy to pay for their portion of meal.
little backstory:
March will be 4 years in this position.
When i started, I had no degree, no certs, and about 6 months of part-time IT experience.
first year and a half was 3rd shift doing boring shit (pretty much just waiting for things to happen).
after that I moved to project work full time - linux administration, automation, vulnerability scanning, app integration, etc.
the projects were also security-based enough that I can look at getting my CISSP when I decide to take the exam.
Not to toot my own horn, but I was that guy that all the PMs wanted on their projects because I got shit done, loved automating and process improving, and I worked my ass off.
Until a year ago, I was hourly, and I working anywhere between 55 and 80 hours per week - so I made good money just because I got a shitload of overtime pay.
Eventually they figured out it was better financially to just promote me to another title and make me salary.
I made a little less per paycheck, but the yearly bonus was better, so it didn't bother me a whole lot.
At this point, I had 45 completed projects under my belt, along with a long list of others where I helped in small ways, and no signs of stopping.
Not once in the (almost) 4 years was I ever given an hourly rate increase outside of the cost of living increases they give everyone - my good paychecks came entirely from my overtime.
When they moved me to salary, they gave me a "salary bump" to compensate for the overtime, but like I said - didn't fully compensate for the lost overtime money.
In this time, I also completed my Bachelor's in IT, grabbed a handful of certs, started my MS, and had been studying my ass off with future goals of going for my OSCP.
Partway through 2020, they put me on a new project that just did not go well.
It was way out of my area of expertise, and the timeline that they wanted just wasn't feasible for me to learn and then also complete the project.
So they kick me off the project, and hire 2 full-time developers to take my spot.
Big red flag there.
I'm not a developer at all - I do some Powershell, Bash, and Python for scripting - but that's it.
and they had to hire 2 developers to take my place on one project.
Along with this, they also took away my promotion - citing "not ready for full-time project work" as the reason.
they knocked me back down to hourly, but also told me to cut down my overtime (this also happened right before Christmas,
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