This is a little complicated. My girlfriend and I are nineteen, and despite all the protection we use, she still somehow got pregnant.
My older sister (34) practically raised me. Our parents were absent most of her childhood and like, all of mine. Our older brother looked after us. Anyway, I literally call her mom, we're that close. She calls me her firstborn.
She's got three legal sons, all adopted. They're basically my younger brothers and I love them to death. So you know, naturally I called her when we found out about the pregnancy.
She calmed us down and explained our options. We knew we did not want to be parents, but my girlfriend said she didn't really want an abortion but didn't want another child to go into the system.
Anyway, scheduled an appointment to get the baby vamooshed, when my sister called again. She said she would adopt our baby if we really didn't want to go through with the abortion. Yada yada, that was like three months ago.
A few friends started asking about names last week when we eventually told them, and we basically explained that we weren't keeping the baby. A friend of ours Em (21) has been trying for a baby with her husband for like two years. We knew, but didn't think much of it. She contacted us asking what we were doing with the baby.
I explained that my older sister was going to adopt them. I guess she found my sister through my Instagram or something and angrily messaged us that she already has three kids and we should think about mothers who can't have children and want one.
At this point we realised what the issue was and I explained that her children were adopted and she hasn't had them as babies, and we want to keep baby in the family.
She didn't reply but one of her and my girlfriends mutual friend messaged me asking if I'd reconsider. I told her no, this baby was going to my sister.
Em messaged me, again, and basically said it was so hard to find a white baby and practically begging to reconsider. I'm biracial, white passing. My sister is not. I got angry and told her I didn't want some white girl stripping another child of their culture, sent her on her way.
It's divided our friends. Some think that she was racist, and some think she's just desperate for a baby. My sister says we can do what we want with the baby, but her home is always open. I think the baby should still go to my sister, but my girlfriend was really affected by Ems words and is concerned that we could be giving a young woman w... keep reading on reddit ➡
Why YSK: because mistakes happen and minds change, especially during such an emotional and stressful time. You don’t have to live with regret because you messed up the spelling or you suddenly realize that the baby’s name just isn’t the right one.
TW: Death, Cancer, Premature birth.
Edit: MIL passed 3 weeks after our daughter came home.
Edit2: My anxiety at the time was not pandemic related (it's a factor yes but wasn't my reason), it was more to do with separation anxiety. I know it's not a good reason either, and I should have just gone with them. I was just reluctant to leave the house once we were all home, after not allowing myself to recover properly after the c-section due to constant visits to NICU.
Me (29F) and my husband (32M) had our daughter a few months ago. Due to complications, I had to have an emergency c-section and she had to be incubated for a few weeks as she was born prematurely. We weren't able to be by her side at all hours of the day and it was agony for us, and it has made me overly protective of her.
Eventually, she was strong enough to come home, and for the first two weeks of her being home I was still recovering from her birth, and she was still so tiny and frail, that we didn't go anywhere. We did have family members (in our bubble) come round to help out with housework, bring us meals occasionally, the usual, but they always came to us, we didn't go out and take the baby to visit people.
My MIL was a phenomenal woman who'd been battling bowel cancer for 3 years. Over the past year her body had gotten progressively weaker and she was essentially bedridden, but was still very sharp mentally, and was excited to welcome her first grandchild into the world.
She was receiving care at home as they'd basically told us that there was nothing more they could do aside from make her comfortable during the time she had left. We knew it was coming eventually, we just didn't know when.
Understandably, my husband was eager to take our daughter over to his parent's house so they could meet her properly, but the thought of taking her out on a trip that wasn't absolutely essential (I.e. Health care related) made me anxious. I didn't go over to visit while I was recovering, but he visited MIL regularly alone - I was just apprehensive about him taking the baby and hated the thought of being apart from her again after what we'd been through, even though it'd only be for a few hours.
I told him that I wanted our little girl to meet her grandparents so much, just not yet - hang on a little bit longer.
Sadly, MIL ended up passing away before we could take our daughter round to meet her. We are all heartbroken, and the grief has hit my husband hard. He's starting to resent that... keep reading on reddit ➡
I've posted this story on TwoXchromosomes and Justnofamily. I thought I'd share it here as well.
I'm a 38 year old woman. I have a great career, a loving boyfriend (31) , great pets and friends. I have never, ever wanted kids. Five years ago, I ended a relationship with a man named Jason (name changed) who, I thought wanted the same things that I did.
We had been together for 2 years in 2015. We'd travel together, read comics, play video games and do all kinds of fun things. I had always been honest with Jason that I never wanted kids. He told me he didn't either. Then, in the summer of that year, I began to notice changes in him. He would talk about how great our friends' kids are. He'd try to get me to spend time with his nephews, even though I wasn't close to them. He also began talking to my parents way more than usual.
Then one evening, he said he wanted to have dinner with my whole family. I found this a bit strange as I don't often spend time with my family. But for him, I agreed. We were having dinner, my parents and siblings (my brother and sister) were there. Then, he dropped a bomb on me.
He got down on one knee and said "I love you. I want you to be the mother of my children".
"What the actual FUCK!" was the first thing that came out of my mouth. We hadn't talked about getting married, much less kids. I never wanted kids and wasn't ready for marriage. I took him to another room and asked him what the hell he was doing. He dropped another bomb and told me he had been talking to my parents about us getting married and starting a family. Let that sink in. He talked to my parents, not me about our future. He said he had asked my dad's permission. My dad's permission, before he asked for my consent. I was furious. All this was obviously meant to pressure me into saying yes.
My mother, being nosy, walked right into the room we were in and asked what was wrong and why I had not said yes. I told her and the whole family that they needed to leave. When they left, I tore Jason a new asshole. I asked him how dare he assume that I was going to marry him and have kids with him, when I had made it very clear that I did not want those things. He told me he was hoping that I would "grow up and want something meaningful". He had the gall to act like I was the bad person in all of this. I threw him out and the following day, I ended the relationship for good.
My parents were pissed at me. My mom cried about how she had been looking forward to get... keep reading on reddit ➡
I'm currently 28, female. I am married with 3 kids (4yo twin boys, 3 month old girl). My grandmother is 71f.
Back when I was 15 my mom had a set of twins (bou and girl). She was put on bed rest because the C-Section she had went wrong and she lost alot of blood. Where she needed help and I went to school full time, she invited my grandmother in to our home (free of cost) to help her out.
At some point or another my mom had threatened to kick her out because every morning my mom would check on the twins to find my brother "missing". My gram (who is extremely overweight) had been taking my brother from his crib and was sleeping with him on her chest on the couch. My mom told her multiple times to stop and she refused so my mom threatened to kick her out. My grandmothers way of retaliating was to tell my mother (who had extreme Postpartum Depression) that my sister (2 months old at the time) rolled off the bed and fell onto the tile floors (this never happened). This obviously caused extreme panic on my moms end, which made her spiral because she was already suffering from the postpartum.
Because of this, I dont want my grandmother anywhere near my baby. I lived out of state when my twins were born so she didnt see them until they were 2 years old and she was never allowed around them alone. However, now that I live in the states and have a baby, she has been harping on me to let her meet my daughter. I kept telling her no, but gave no reason up until last night. Where I reminded her that where I witnessed her causing my mom unnecessary panic, I would not be allowing her near my child because I'm not going to chance her doing the same thing with me.
My grandmother lost it and really tried saying that that scenario never happened and that we made it all up to make her look bad. A lot of the family has also sided with her (she told everyone) and says that I need to "let shit go" and "stop living in the past". I have been told that I am alienating my grandmother and that I am going to destroy her by not letting her build a bond with my child. AITA?
I’ve been a Rockets fan for a long time. We’ve had a couple bad ideas with uniform selections, but this one just feels so off. Off in the way that it would feel if the Lakers came out with red uniforms or the Celtics with purple. That being said, the timing of this awful addition couldn’t have lined up better with a more awful time for the franchise. Shit jerseys for a shit year. Hopefully the trade will be the refresher the franchise needs because baby blue jerseys are certainly not it.
Use this post to discuss whatever you want! Future dream casts, trying your stand up career, crying shenanigans about this season's robbed cinnamon bun... it all goes here. Just remember to be civil and keep opinions here and not in the speculation threads. Thank you!
Today's title is brought to you by u/Spencer-Santana !